Dreams of Haiti

Back to School

2009-09-01T15:19:00.004-04:00

Today was Danielle's first day of kindergarten, so all three kids have officially started school. I was actually a bit worried when Danielle still wasn't home an hour after school had ended - apparently there was a problem of some sort and the bus didn't get to the school until almost an hour late. But, she made it home and wasn't upset about it, so all's well.

Noah has been doing great at his new school. I was actually thrilled the other day because he told me, out of the blue, that he had colored a frog at school that day. That may not sound like a big deal to most people, but this was the first time that he's actually been able to spontaneously tell me something that he did during the day (usually he would just tell me that he rode the bus every day!) Plus, today, he was able to recite most of the Brown Bear book ("Brown bear, brown bear, what do you see? I see a red bird looking at me.") and he actually got most of the colors right. Progress!

Jaden's first day of school was yesterday. It went well, but it was only two hours long and it was hard to get much out of him about the day (as is typical). Danielle was the opposite, though. She came home today, bubbling about her first day of school. First, and most exciting, they threw some of their "preschool words" out the window. She demonstrated for me how she said words like "potty" and "teacher" (instead of Mrs. Sajovec) into her hand and then threw them away. It was very cute! She also told me that they got to meet the principle and then showed me how she traced letters in a little workbook (she had to show me how she traced every single letter). I love that she actually tells me about her day. Such a refreshing change from her brothers. :-)

So, the school year is underway. Praying it all continues to go smoothly...

Changes

2009-04-30T01:45:00.003-04:00

So, Scott is starting a new job next week. It's a completely new role and he was with his current company for 10 years, so it's going to be a big change for him. It will probably be big for all of us, since we've gotten used to his current schedule and the fact that he's able to come home with little notice if we really need him. He'll have a bit more of a commute on some days now and he'll probably be working a lot of hours at first so that he can ramp up. Still, he won't have to work on Saturdays anymore and he won't be getting 2 AM emergency calls when a server is down. I think it's a good trade-off.

And, of course, it won't be long until the kids are out of school. That will be interesting. I've got to get them signed up for some summer activities or I just might go out of my mind with all three of them home all day! Noah will have summer school for one month of summer break. He has made some great progress since he started at his new school in October, but he's still at the level of a 2 or 3-year-old and more learning opportunities can only help.

Now that Noah's been home for over a year, we're facing the reality that he may not ever catch up to his peers. It's such a hard balance - I don't want to underestimate him and therefore undermine his chances at that quintessential "normal" life. But, I also want to be realistic and adjust my expectations accordingly - He may never go to the same school as Jaden and Danielle. He might not learn to read (right now, he can't identify his letters or even say his ABC's). He might be a lot more dependent on us than we had originally imagined. If he is going to participate in any activities, they will most likely need to be geared toward kids with special needs.

These are all things that I think about, wonder about. I imagine him as a 6-year-old, a 10-year-old, a 12-year-old. What will his life be like? We just don't know. If your child has Down's Syndrome, you have a frame of reference - you have some idea of what to expect. Noah looks "normal". He hasn't been diagnosed with anything but sensory processing disorder and now most likely ADHD. I don't know what to expect - I just know that he's not learning as quickly as a 4 and a half year-old should.

When it comes to his speech, sometimes people say, "Oh, but he's still learning English." But, I know that this isn't the case. I read the stories of the other moms of kids adopted from COTP - other kids who were adopted at about the same time or later - kids who are about the same age as Noah. They all talk about how their children speak perfect English (they were exposed to quite a bit of English in the orphanage). They quote their kids and I think "There's no way Noah could say something like that."

So, in my gut, I think I've come to the conclusion that Noah will never be an average kid. If I'm being very honest with myself, I knew it when I met him at just 1 year old. I knew then that something was different about him. That it wasn't deafness, but something else. I just couldn't put a name to it (I still can't) - I thought maybe autism - I didn't know, but I knew that it was something, even when his caretakers insisted that he was developing normally. Over the years, while we waited for Noah to come home and we got reports on him, they always seemed to be so normal. There was never any indication that he wasn't just like all the other kids. No one seemed worried about his development. I started to convince myself that maybe Noah wouldn't have any issues at all. Maybe he would be a completely average boy. And then he came home and he was delayed, not just a little, but a lot. I still told myself that he could catch up once he had the proper learning environment - the proper stimulation, but there was always a nagging feeling. Again, the feeling that something, that all elusive something, was off. And, here I am, a year later, wondering if my instincts were right all along. Wondering if, in those few days that I shared with my little 1-year-old boy, I could see something that the people who took care of him on a daily basis couldn't. They had too much else going on. A mother's instinct? I don't know.

What I do know is that God meant for Noah to be a part of our family. And that no matter what Noah may or may not accomplish in the future, he deserves love and security and the chance for the very best future possible for him. So, that's what I have to focus on. That's all I can give.

Warm Weather

2009-03-14T19:36:00.005-04:00

The weather is finally starting to warm up and we're able to play outdoors again. Hip, hip, hooray! I really hated being cooped up all winter. Of course, we went out and played in the snow sometimes, but it's been cold and I'm really a wimp when it comes to the cold. Warm weather also means more pictures of the kids - outdoor shots are always the most fun. Jaden has just learned how to ride his bike (sans training wheels) and Noah also learned how to ride the little bike. Which means that Danielle got a new (well, pre-owned) bike of her own. Everybody wants to ride as often as possible. Today we rode to the park and enjoyed the warm day!

A Year Home

2009-03-05T00:23:00.002-05:00

Next Wednesday, we'll be celebrating Noah being home with us for one year. It's hard to believe. This year has been such a crazy rollercoaster ride. I'm not going to lie - some of the twists and turns have been painful. I haven't always been sure I was going to make it to the end in one piece either. Luckily, God has been my safety belt, and He won't ever fail.

So, here we are, one year later and I'm finally feeling a sense of peace. A sense that not only is this God's plan for us (which I've always felt), but that I'm up to the task at hand. We can do this, we really can!!

We're settling in. I honestly never thought it would take a year to be able to truly say that. But, sometimes life doesn't meet our expectations. It's taken time for Noah and I to let go - to give up the constant struggle for control that dominated his first months home. It's taken time for me to open my heart completely to my sweet, funny boy. And I think it's taken time for him to open his little heart to me - to seek love from his family rather than broadcasting out overwhelming, desperate pleas for affection that seemed to be aimed toward anyone at all. We're both starting to trust that this truly is right. And once we trust that, it can actually start to feel right.

Noah's developmental issues are still there. He's still dealing with the sensory issues, but we've been going to a great occupational therapist who is giving us lots of great tools to help him. For example, we've been doing a technique called brushing with him and this seems to help calm him. His speech is still significantly delayed, but we are making great progress thanks to speech therapy at school and through private therapy. We've been working on full sentences ("I want the ball please" instead of "Ball please"). Tonight, Scott and I rejoiced at the sound of Noah correctly pronouncing his name ("Noah" rather than "Woah"). Rejoiced!! You should have seen how proud he was. He was so happy with our reaction that he just kept saying, "Again!" and then he'd say it one more time for one more whoop of joy. Pronunciation is only one small aspect of his speech problems, but there's something special about him mastering his name. It seems like a true milestone. We're definitely making progress.

In the meantime, Jaden has been officially diagnosed with ADHD. We were really trying to avoid putting him on medication, but finally broke down in January and decided to do it for now. We have been on a special diet for the past 9 months that has really helped him a lot (absolutely no artificial flavors, colors or preservatives). I am now an absolute believer that the artificial junk in our foods is completely unhealthy. We changed our diet for Jaden, but it had unexpected results for us as well - I got a stomachache every night for years, but this completely went away when we took out the artificial ingredients from our diet. And Scott found that he gets many fewer headaches now. Unfortunately, while Jaden was doing really well at home, he was still having a lot of focus and behavioral issues at school that we just couldn't solve. The medication seems to be helping a lot, so we'll leave him on it for now and revisit some other options over the summer. Add a few more loops to that rollercoaster that I mentioned earlier. :-) But, really, I'm just so thankful for my sweet, creative, imaginative boy. ADHD or not, he has something special.

And then there's Danielle, who always gets the least amount of mention just because she's so, well, normal. Okay, she has her quirks (it took us over a month to convince her to take most of her Christmas presents out of their packaging), but in general, she's your average lovable 4-year-old girl. She just stopped sucking her thumb, which makes us incredibly proud. Apparently, she was just ready now, because nothing we did before ever got through to her, but this time she pretty much quit cold-turkey. See, miracles do still happen!

Kids are such a blessing. I just can't imagine my life without these three little faces, these three little personalities. And I know the roller coaster ride isn't over yet. I'm sure there will be another stomach-lurching drop around the corner. But for right now, I'm going to just enjoy this gently curving piece of track and be happy. And trust that God's controlling the ride.

Processing It All

2008-11-10T14:54:00.003-05:00

I realize it has been way too long since I've updated the blog. Things have been crazy around here, though, and they're just starting to settle down a bit now. First of all, check out the cute pictures of the kiddos at Halloween! Aren't they the sweetest?! It was so warm for Halloween this year - it's the first time I can ever remember worrying that the kids might be too hot in their costumes (Noah's monkey suit was perfect for our normally frigid Halloweens - not so perfect for 70 degree weather).

Okay, on to the serious stuff. We recently had Noah evaluated through the school district. We weren't surprised to find out that he tested 1-2 years delayed in all areas, but we were surprised to find out why - He has Sensory Processing Disorder. Noah is what they call a "sensory seeker", which means that he is constantly seeking out more sensory input. This is why, for instance, he constantly needs to touch everything around him, puts things into his mouth, rolls crazily on the ground (after throwing himself down onto the floor), crashes into everyone and everything and likes to hang on people. He needs that extra sensory input because his body isn't processing the sensory signals properly. He also may have trouble with auditory processing, which may account for his speech delays. His other delays could also be caused by sensory issues or they might be "side effects" of the fact that he can't slow down long enough to process and learn new information the way other kids can.

The good thing about all of this is that, now that we know what Noah's issues are, we can start to help him. Last week, Noah was moved to a school with only 6 children in the classroom. He also started speech and occupational therapy. I've already read two books on SPD, so I've learned some ways that I can help him at home too (hopefully I'll learn even more from the occupational therapists). I was honestly starting to get very frustrated at the lack of progress that we had been making on basic life skills and concepts. Working with Noah was next to impossible for me because he has such a short attention span - we couldn't work on anything for more than 1 minute without it becoming a major hassle. Plus, I was at my wit's end because Noah often makes every day tasks very difficult. A trip to the grocery store can be painful. Playing a board game with the kids is hard to do because he can't follow along and play and he also can't curb his impulses to grab the pieces or overturn the board or just throw things around. I've had to ban him completely from Jaden and Danielle's rooms because within five minutes he will have scattered things everywhere and broken pieces. A couple of weeks ago, I went to pick Noah up from his MOPS group and the woman in his room greeted me with, "I need to give you a hug. Things must be so hard for you!" "Oh no!" I thought, "He was that bad?" That was one of those days that I didn't know whether to laugh or cry (unfortunately, cry wins out more often than I'd like to admit).

Well, it now feels like we're moving toward progress - or at least the possibility of progress. Steps in a positive direction - hope for change. And a little hope goes a long way... :-)

Urgent Need

2008-09-11T18:22:00.002-04:00

I found this on a friend's blog and wanted to post as well. Scott and I just made a donation to this cause - please consider doing the same. The situation is Haiti is very desperate because of the recent hurricanes!

Northern and Central Haiti have been the hardest hit. The area around Noah's former orphanage has been damaged quite badly. Even in good weather, the road from Cap Haitien to the orphanage was very bad. Now it is under water. There is no way for things to get in or out of the orphanage right now. They are well supplied, but the surrounding area has seen a lot of devastation.

But there IS something that you all can do. In Cazale, Haiti is a wonderful center run by Lori Moise and Licia Bector. Real Hope For Haiti Rescue Center takes in and brings back to health many, many little ones as well as adults. Lori and Licia are amazing people, doing exactly what God called them to do. (The friend who originally posted about this knows them personally).

Cazale was hit very, very hard by both Gustav and Hanna. Cazale was destroyed. Many, many people are dead. The situation right now in Cazale is dire. The drinking water lines were unearthed and ripped apart by the raging mudslides and torrential rains. The only bridge in and out is not passable by vehicles. Food is scarce. Real Hope for Haiti is paying people to haul water from the river. They are then filtering it the best they can to make it drinkable.

On Lori's blog, about a third of the way down on the left, is a PayPal button. If you are able to give at all, earmark the funds to be dispersed to Licia to pay the people hauling water. They will also need money to start rebuilding. Most of the families around them have also lost everything. Gas is expected to rise for Haitians in the wake of the storms, so that will be another thing they will need money for.

Please click on the links below to see the devastation...
After Hurricane Hanna and before Hurricane Ike
John and Beth McHoul's Blog-Heartline Ministries Chris and Leslie Rolling, working with Clean Water for Haiti, also in an area that was heavily impacted by the hurricanes
Licia's blog-Real Hope for Haiti Rescue Center
Lori's blog-She's a nurse in Haiti working at the Rescue Center

Those Last Days of Summer

2008-08-26T12:54:00.004-04:00

Well, today is Jaden's first full day of school. It's hard to believe that he'll be gone the whole day!! I'm going to miss him! We've been packing a lot of things into the end of summer. First of all, we went to a COTP reunion in Minnesota. We had a really great time and were able to meet lots of other COTP families!! After the reunion, we stayed in Minnesota for a few days and went to the Mall of America (the picture is from the Lego store in the mall), went camping (in a cabin) and went to the Cave of Mysteries. It was a great break from "regular" life.

When we got back from camping, we had most of the interior of the house painted, which was long overdue. (We had done the powder room and the bedrooms ourselves, but we hadn't gotten to the rest of the house - and who knows when we ever would). It was a bit of a pain since the painters were here for two weeks (we had lots of wallpaper that had to be removed), but, wow, what a difference!! I'm so glad that I don't have to be embarrassed about our house anymore. It was getting pretty ridiculous - peeling wallpaper, marks on the walls from the previous owners' pictures, patches from repairs that had been repaired, and even holes in the walls in some places. Now it looks just beautiful - I'm so happy with the finished product! Now if we can just manage to keep things organized, it will be perfect (I'm not counting on it though). :-)

Finally, this past Friday, we got to spend the day downtown. One of Scott's vendors (at work) offered to pay for a family day for us, since Scott had been spending so much time away from the family, working on problems caused by one of their products. They gave us tickets for the circus, the ferris wheel and a boat tour. Plus, they gave us tons of spending money! It's amazing how much fun you can have when you don't have to worry at all about how much it's all costing. "You want a program for the circus? Why not? You want to drive the motorized boats? Sure thing. You want to go to the funhouse? Love to." We could pretty much do anything we wanted and didn't have to worry about the cost. How often can we do that? (Um, never). So, we've officially decided that we're going to seek corporate sponsorship for all of our family events. Hey, we'll wear logo T-shirts and hats and stuff - do a little advertising along the way. Think we'll get any takers? Okay, not gonna happen, but we can dream, right? :-)

Pool Days

2008-07-22T22:04:00.008-04:00

We have been having a very fun summer! Just as I suspected, Noah absolutely loves the pool. He is completely fearless - we have some awesome video of him jumping into the pool, flipping a raft (and himself) over, somehow sticking his feet up into the air while on his back and just generally swimming around crazily (in water wings, of course). It is so funny to watch him play! He and Jaden love to jump in at the same time and see who can be craziest, but Danielle is still her usual timid self - her version of jumping into the pool is standing on the ladder up to her shoulders and gently pushing off into the water (after which, she'll exclaim, "Mommy, I jumped!)

We've also just gotten past three birthday celebrations for Jaden. On his actual birthday, we went to Great America for the day. Then, on the 4th of July, we had a family party for him and for his twin cousins Krista & Molly (who are 10 hours younger than Jaden) and also for his other cousin Spencer (who was just about to turn 3). That was a fun and eventful celebration! But, Jaden was probably most excited about his first ever "friend" birthday party. He invited a few friends from school and our family friends (who Jaden has known since he was in Mommy's tummy). The kids all made Noah's Ark animals and got to dress them up in fun outfits. It was so cute and lots of fun!!

At the end of this week, we're heading to Minnesota to attend a Children of the Promise reunion. We're really looking forward to seeing Noah's friends and other COTP families and we're also going to be heading to the Mall of America and the Cave of Mysteries. Yay!! This will be our first family vacation with the whole family and we're really excited!

It's been a long time

2008-06-17T22:13:00.002-04:00

So, it's been a very long time since I've posted. Probably because I'm not sure how to sum life up lately. It seems like there's so much to say and I have no idea where to start. Life since Noah came home has been full of amazing moments and, at times, frustration. I've really had to get used to the fact that Noah is developmentally and socially more of a two-year-old than an almost-four-year-old. Now, I've got to say that I struggled when Jaden and Danielle were two. It's a hard age. There are so many things to get into and Noah, of course, wants to get into them all. He's constantly touching things, pulling things off of tables or counters, breaking things. He often yells randomly, just to hear himself make noise (this is especially frustrating in the car). He likes to test the boundaries - see what he can get away with. On my good days, I handle this all very well. On my bad days, I get incredibly frustrated and don't deal with it well at all.

On the flip side of things, I have seen so many changes in Noah and in myself (the way I deal with him) since he came home. He's starting to respond to discipline (and not always by laughing at his bad behavior, which he used to do). His speech is still limited - we can't have a true "conversation" - but, he's really talking so much more than when he first came home. He's able to express his needs and desires, which has helped a lot. He's also improved in other developmental skills - working on puzzles, listening to full stories, playing with toys - things like that. And, he is still a super-sweet, loving boy. He's always the first to offer up a kiss or an "I bove you!" (nope - that's not a typo - that's the way he says it). He loves to run and play and always wants to help. And he has so much fun with everything - I love to watch him giggle at just about everything!

It's already hard to remember life without him. I honestly can't believe it's only been 3 months since he's been home. Even when things are crazy, I know this is the way it's supposed to be. This is our crazy life - I wouldn't have it any other way!

Great American Fun

2008-04-21T15:15:00.003-04:00

We had a fun trip to Great America yesterday!! Noah got to ride on his first rides - we even took him on the Whizzer! I think he really liked it, but he definitely got a worried look on his face sometimes. :-)

A Day in the Life

2008-04-15T10:06:00.002-04:00

Things have been going really well around here. Yesterday was a really fun day. Jaden, Noah, Danielle and I played with the kitchen in Jaden's room. Noah doesn't know how to play with many toys, but he knows how to eat! And, he thought pretend eating was just tons of fun! So, Jaden and Danielle would make up special recipes and serve them up to me and Noah. I think it's the longest that we've all ever spent together playing with toys.

Then, in the evening, we had a rousing game of hide and seek. Noah couldn't really figure out the hiding part (even with Mommy or Daddy helping him), but he sure had fun with the counting and the seeking! It was so cute because he'd always first go look wherever the last person was hiding.

It's amazing to me how well all three kids have been getting along. I really expected more shaky adjustments on everyone's part. Noah is a part of the family - just like that. Is he sometimes a pesky little brother? Sure. Does he sometimes try my patience? Yep. But, man, do we love him!!

More Cuteness

2008-04-03T20:36:00.004-04:00

As you can see from the first picture, Noah is no longer afraid of Sota. This is him trying to get a free ride. We really have an awesome dog - he just sat there calmly while Noah climbed onto his back. Noah's now also happy to feed Sota and has even been spotted giving him kisses. We've come a long way! (And yes, I realize that my family room is in a sad, sad state - I thought it was messy before, but Noah has shown me a new level of disaster - he is an expert at spreading toys, ripping papers, scattering DVD's and tossing crayons about the room. Quite a talent.)

The second picture is of Noah when we were having fun putting stickers on each other. He just thought this was hysterical!

Today, Noah, Danielle and I went to the grocery store. Noah is so cute because he really wants to help with things. He insisted on helping bring the groceries in. Even when we were down to just the things that were really too heavy for him - you should have seen how cute he looked carrying a big old jug of apple juice. :-)

Another funny story about helping - Whenever Noah is finished with his food, he will immediately hold up his plate for me to take it and say, "Fini. All done." Sometimes, he won't even wait until he's actually finished with his food - as soon as he's picked up the last piece, he'll hold the plate up with the other hand. "Fini. All done." We're now to the point where I can convince him to put the plate back on the table until everyone else is done with their food, but he still always at least tries to give it to me.

That's it for tonight. Thanks for tuning in. :-)

Cuteness

2008-04-02T21:35:00.002-04:00

I so love waking up in the morning to hugs from a certain little boy! Most mornings, Noah wakes up and comes straight into our room and climbs into bed with me to snuggle. Now, this is pretty much the ultimate sweetness in my book. Jaden long ago figured out that he can get my attention at any time by saying, "Mommy, I want to snuggle with you." Yep, I'll pretty much drop anything at that point. And Noah is obviously figuring that out as well. Not only do I get hugs in the morning, but pretty much anytime I sit on the couch, Noah climbs on up into my lap. He does this cute thing where he hugs me and pushes his cheek against mine as hard as he can. It's a very intense hug. :-)

Some other quick cute things - Noah loves to play with my hair. A lot of times, he drapes it over his head and face and then giggles because it tickles him. His feet are also VERY ticklish, which is amazing to me since he walked around on rocks at COTP and it didn't faze him at all. How can he not feel rocks, but a little tickling drives him insane?

Noah absolutely LOVES the bathtub and is not afraid of the water at all. It's all I can do to keep him from actually diving into the tub - he lays down, ducks his head under, sticks his head under the running faucet - it's crazy! If Danielle gets the tiniest drop of water in her eye, she's calling for a towel. I can't wait to see him in the pool!!

There's lots more, but I'm getting tired, so I'll have to save it for later. Boy, do I love this little guy!

Another Little Update

2008-04-01T20:10:00.004-04:00

I know it's been awhile since I've posted. It seems like time is flying by and I don't know where it's gone most of the time. Last week was a bit hectic since it was spring break, which meant both Jaden and Danielle were home all day, every day (normally Jaden is in school in the mornings and Danielle is in school two afternoons a week). Plus, Scott went back to work for three days last week (back a full week this week). It's definitely different to be home with the kids all day by myself. Noah takes a lot more supervision than Jaden and Danielle. And sometimes the three of them can get pretty crazy while playing together. It can be a bit challenging.

I've started giving Noah time-outs when he doesn't listen, and the first few were pretty rough. He doesn't like having to sit in one spot and the timer doesn't start until he stays sitting (I give him a little leeway, but he can't be crawling all over the stairs). And, after a time-out is over in our house, you have to say sorry for the misbehavior. Well, that was a MAJOR issue the first time. Mind you, Noah will generally repeat anything you ask him to say. He loves repeating. But, after his first time-out, he was mad and he absolutely refused to say, "Sorry Mommy." In fact, at first, he would just turn his head away from me and wouldn't look at me at all. I could tell that the other kids and the TV were a distraction, so I took Noah into the other room and sat him on my lap. I kept him there until he said sorry. He finally got to go play after about an HOUR and fifteen minutes. Yep - it was crazy. Sometimes Noah passed the time passively, sometimes he got upset and cried because he wanted to go, sometimes he tried distracting me from the goal at hand by talking about something else (usually pointing and saying "gade"). I just kept reminding him that if he wanted to go and play he would have to say "Sorry Mommy." There were quite a few times when I wondered if I should give up - especially when he would cry. I kept thinking, "How long do I do this for?" But, at the same time, I knew with almost absolute certainty that he knew what I wanted him to do and that he was just being stubborn to see if he could win our first battle. I was pretty sure that I was setting a precedent here and I really didn't want to give him the message that he could hold out for longer than I could. Still, I think I was reaching the point of desperation when he finally blurted out, "Sorry Mommy" (actually it sounded more like "sublunmb Mommy" - but that worked just fine for me). You would have thought that he won a marathon for all the hugs and cheering that he got for saying those words!!

Since then, time-outs have been much less painful. I think he decided that my excitement at him saying sorry was more motivating than his need to be stubborn (or he just decided he didn't want another hour long time-out) because the next time, he said it immediately. I was so relieved and so glad that I had stuck it out. I know he needs to start learning that he has boundaries in our household, but it really is hard.

Let's see. After that long explanation, what else new can I mention. Noah's getting better at the stairs. He can go down without us holding his hand now as long as he's not too distracted (but we usually still remind him "one step, one step, one step...). Naps have been on-again, off-again, which can be challenging. I'm pretty sure at COTP he took a three hour nap every day, so I'm not sure why he sometimes doesn't seem to want to nap now. Once again, I think he might be testing to see if I'll eventually just let him out of bed to play - but I haven't quite figured out the right way to handle this yet. Noah is starting to pick up a few more English words, but the doctor said that we should call the school district to have him evaluated since he's definitely developmentally behind in speech (we also want to do a hearing test to make sure that there's no remaining impairment).

That's all I can think of for now. As I keep saying, things are going amazingly smoothly so far. We really couldn't ask for much more at this point. :-)

Easter Fun

2008-03-24T10:55:00.002-04:00

We had a great Easter yesterday. We went up to Wisconsin to visit Scott's sister and his neices. Noah seemed to have a lot of fun. We did learn, though, that no matter how tired Noah is, he won't sleep in the car. When he's extremely tired, he does this thing where he starts blinking constantly. He was already doing that at 11:30 AM yesterday. We thought for sure he would sleep during the drive to Wisconsin, but it never happened (both Jaden and Danielle fell asleep instead - and Danielle almost never sleeps in the car!).

Things have been going well around here. In general, Noah is a happy, fun little boy. I am definitely happy that Noah was able to come home to another three-year-old and a five-year-old. I've just loved watching the kids run around the house together - Noah fits right in!

On the other side of things, I do feel bad because I think that the words I say most to Noah are "pas touche" (don't touch). It's hard because there are so many things that Jaden and Danielle can do that Noah just can't. They play on the computer, but I generally have to keep Noah away from it because he just pounds on the keyboard and repeatedly clicks the mouse. The older kids can use the remote, but Noah tries to grab it at random times and ends up messing up the TV settings. He loves to play with the doors on the cabinet that holds DVD's - the doors are glass, though and I worry about him opening and closing it repeatedly - another "don't touch". The list goes on - poor kiddo. I really hate to make this our most popular phrase, but it seems necessary at this point. Hopefully that will change soon.

Another frustration is Noah's method of playing - it pretty much consists of dumping everything onto the floor (although, he was a bit better about it today - he played with dinosaurs with Jaden and Danielle and seemed to have fun actually playing - he then cradled his giant dinosaur and rocked it like a baby - so cute!). Whenever Noah is naughty, he gets this grin on his face and laughs - I think he got away with a lot at the orphanage by being cute, but it really just frustrates me when he knows he's disobeying and he's giggling about it. I have to remind myself that this is a learned behavior - the way he got what he wanted at the orphanage - and that it will eventually go away (I hope). Noah threw his first fit (which really just consisted of crying- no tantrum behavior) when we took away his Easter basket. Boy, does he love candy!! Not too bad, though - we went almost two weeks without a fit being thrown. I'd say that's fantastic! And Noah sleeps straight through the night, which is a big deal to me - I am not good on no sleep. I can't wait until Noah can talk a bit more so that communication is easier. But, otherwise things are good.

Anyway, it's impossible to describe everything that goes on around here - it's just way too complex. But, this post kind of gives you an idea of how this transitionary period is going. It's already starting to feel more and more "normal" - I'm sure we'll have more surprises along the way, though.

Some Pictures

2008-03-22T09:54:00.003-04:00

Home At Last

2008-03-17T21:03:00.003-04:00

How do I even begin to describe life these past few days? I want to describe everything, but this blog would be about 40 pages long and I'd probably fall asleep here at the keyboard. So, I'll just try to hit the highlights.

Coming home was such an amazing experience for us. I was imagining that Noah would go back into his shell a bit once we were away from COTP, but apparently the days we spent there were well spent and he felt secure enough with us to be himself on the trip home. He LOVES airports, which was really fun. He spent most of the time pointing out the windows, yelling "avian!" (airplane) or "gade!" (look!). He never tired of looking at the airplanes or the little cars that carry baggage, etc. He was fascinated! Once we got to the US, it was even more fun because Noah was loving the escalators and moving walkways - every time we would get on or off of one, he would just laugh and laugh! I almost felt bad when we left the airport to come home - I just kept thinking how much he'd miss the airport. :-)

The transition home has been going amazingly smoothly so far. The three kids have been loving each other! It gets a bit wild around here at times - the older kids always tend to start bouncing off the walls at about 4:00 PM anyway. Now at 4:00, I would swear that we've added another three kids to the mix instead of just one! But, boy, they're having fun!

There have definitely been some adjustments for us all. It's interesting because even though Noah's three, he's like a much younger child in many ways. We've had to gate off the stairs again because he tends to head down at breakneck speed and he's really not good at navigating them. We've also had to make sure to keep the doors to the basement and the garage locked up. He's big enough to get into a lot and he really doesn't know yet what things are okay and what things can be dangerous (or what can be broken or turn into a big mess, etc), so we have to watch him very closely. So far, we haven't had any problems, but I'm kind of holding my breath, waiting for something to happen. And, of course, things like table manners, which we've gotten to the point of hardly worrying about with the older kids, are now works in progress (at the orphanage, Noah didn't really worry about making sure that food and drinks didn't end up on the floor). Meal times have gone pretty well, though. Noah seems to be used to eating anything that's put in front of him, but he's not used to picking up food with his hands and eating it. I have to take his sandwich or his hot dog apart so he'll eat it because he hasn't quite figured out how to take bites off of the food. But, he eats his fruits and vegetables - which is good since he hasn't had the best nutrition up to this point (they just don't have access to lots of fruits and vegetables in Haiti).

Noah is definitely scared of Sota, but he's starting to get used to him. They had dogs at the orphanage, but they're not really family pets. They're guard dogs and the kids mostly stay away from them - not because the dogs are mean - they actually put up with a lot - but I think the nannies are a bit afraid of them and that gets transferred to the kids.

Other than that, it's been smooth sailing. Noah's a good sleeper and he's been a happy little boy since he's been home! I'm sure there'll be lots more bumps along the way, but we can't ask for much more at this point. Here we are - a family of five!

Quick Update

2008-03-12T20:56:00.002-05:00

I'm pretty tired, so I'm not going to write much tonight. But, I did want to give a quick update and let everybody know that we got to visit Ruthlande today. She seemed so big!! I honestly thought that she looked like she had doubled in size since she stayed with us. It's obvious that she's doing really well. Her mom says that she can scoot around now and that she talks a lot! We were really happy that she didn't cry when she saw us - she was definitely timid, but not upset. It was just so good to see her again and to see how well she's doing. Definitely an answer to prayer!

Other than that, we mostly just hung out with Noah today. He loves to play T-ball, so he and Daddy had lots of fun with that. We had an all-around fun day!

Dreams of Haiti Becoming a Reality

2008-03-11T20:11:00.002-05:00

We're at COTP now. It's nice to see Noah back in his element. Obviously, the new environment in PaP made him a bit unsure of himself because he was SUPER quiet and almost bordering on lethargic - he really just wanted to sit in our laps the whole day. That was fine with us, of course, but he was just acting a bit odd. I saw him back in July and I had to tell Scott, "This is not what he's normally like." In fact, the first day that we met him, he did not make a sound - he was completely silent all day. When we got to Dr. B's (where we spent the night last night), Claudette said, "Did they tell you that he doesn't speak?" I had to laugh and say that I have heard him speak before! He did start talking on the car ride to the visa appointment.

When we got to COTP, it was a completely different story. Gone was the timid little boy who seemed unsteady on his feet. He was replaced by a rambunctious three-year-old who wanted to see what kind of mischief he could get away with! The kids were out on the back porch playing (what an amazing play area they have back there!) and Noah was having so much fun. And he was jabbering up a storm! I couldn't understand most of it, of course, but he was definitely no longer silent.

Our visa appointment went well this morning despite the fact that we were two hours late (apparently there was a mix-up and NLL thought we were supposed to go at 9:00, when in fact we were supposed to be there at 7:00). Luckily, they very graciously allowed us to do the appointment late. NLL went back in the afternoon to pick up the visa, but apparently the machine was broken today, so they will go back for it tomorrow. Luckily, we have plenty of leeway since we're not leaving until Saturday.

That's it for now. I'm feeling MUCH better after a good night's sleep last night and Scott and I are going to head to bed early tonight as well. We'll keep you updated!

Greetings from Haiti!

2008-03-10T15:34:00.002-05:00

Well, we're here and our little boy is currently napping in Daddy's lap (actually, Daddy's taking a little nap himself). It's so surreal! The trip was hard - mostly because I have had the flu since Wednesday and I just can't shake it. I've had fevers off and on and I've now developed a really nasty cough that kept both Scott and I up all night. Literally, I didn't sleep at all last night. So that made for a rough day of travel today. Dr. B and Samuel from NLL picked us up at the airport and brought us back to the NLL office. We then waited here for about 2 and a half hours before Daryl brought Noah to us. I was feeling incredibly miserable and thought at a couple of points during the day that I might faint. So, I actually ended up laying my head down on a NLL desk and taking a nap! Luckily, Ibuprofin broke my fever and I felt human again by the time Daryl showed up with Noah. I was very thankful for that because I didn't want to be in a haze when I saw my boy again!

He's such a sweetie. He's been very content to sit on our laps and eat some snacks and play with his little toys. It was obvious that it was normally naptime for him - he was definitely acting sleepy! It's so amazing to know that he's coming home with us in a few days!!

The Day is Here!!!!

2008-03-06T17:47:00.002-05:00

We have a visa appointment!!! We will be flying to Haiti on MONDAY (leaving here on Sunday afternoon) and our visa appointment is scheduled for Tuesday morning! My mind is racing with everything that I need to accomplish before Sunday.

It's real - HE'S COMING HOME!!!

Grumbling

2008-03-02T18:02:00.002-05:00

Well, as often happens in life, God's timing is not my timing. And, like the Israelites, I've been grumbling. Just like them, I've found myself crying out, "God, you sent me on this journey, why did you have to make it so hard?!"

I honestly don't understand it and I might never understand it. That is something that I will just have to deal with. For now, I am trying very hard to be patient. To put an end to the grumbling and to trust that God didn't put me on this journey for no reason. There is an end in sight, even if only He sees it.

My sight is so very limited, after all.

Update on Ruthlande

2008-02-20T14:20:00.004-05:00

I got this sweet picture of Ruthlande today. Doesn't she look amazing!! Her mom says that she's talking all the time now and she's doing really well. She wouldn't smile for the picture, though - apparently, she's still very afraid of white people. Poor little sweetie - she probably worries that she'll be taken away from her mom again anytime she sees a white person!

I'm just so happy to see her and to know that she's doing well - We miss her!!

The Wait Continues

2008-02-19T16:52:00.003-05:00

The consulate got my I600 approval (USCIS sent another copy out). But when I called hoping to make the visa appointment today, I was told that they need to talk to NLL because they have some questions about the paperwork. She wasn't very clear on what the issues are, but for some reason I got the impression that something was filled out incorrectly? This might just be wishful thinking, though - if something is wrong with a document and we need to get another one from archives, we can expect to wait another month or more.

We'll just have to wait and see...

Stalled Again

2008-02-14T16:06:00.004-05:00

Well, we knew it couldn't go smoothly, didn't we? Today, Daryl called the USCIS office in Haiti to find out the status of Noah's paperwork for the birth parent interview. They said that they sent the paperwork - but they didn't send it to the consulate in Haiti. For some reason, they sent our paperwork to the Chicago USCIS office!! Robin says she has no idea why they would do this - she doesn't know of any circumstance where the birth parent interview paperwork would be sent back to the US, so she can't imagine why they would make this mistake.

So, now I have to try calling the USCIS office in Haiti (it was already closed when I found all of this out today) to see if they can somehow send copies of the paperwork to the consulate (I don't know if they have copies or if the consulate will accept them, but that's what we're going to try to find out). I'm also calling the Chicago office to see if they have received the paperwork (I don't know exactly when it was sent out). I'm really not sure what they would even do with the paperwork if they got it. Still, I'm hoping that maybe they recieved it and put it in my (now closed) file. I'm hoping they'll let me drive to the office and pick it up. And then I'm hoping that Carine at the US consulate in Haiti will allow us to make the visa appointment and bring the documents with us.

I know that's a lot of things to hope for. And, let's face it, my interactions with the USCIS Chicago office up to this point have not gone well. But, I still have to hope.

This has not been an easy road. It's hard to see God's purpose in all of this, but I know that He has one. I just pray that our son will be home with us soon!

UPDATE: I did speak to the officer in the Chicago office. She was actually very pleasant this time, but she said they haven't received anything. She had me send an email requesting that they contact me if it comes in.

Not Quite There Yet

2008-02-12T16:40:00.000-05:00

So, I called the consulate today and, unfortunately, they haven't gotten the paperwork from the birth parent interview yet. Daryl says they will keep calling every day until they have it. Then, we'll be able to schedule the visa appointment and go get our little boy!

And Closer Yet...

2008-02-06T16:57:00.001-05:00

I just got this email from Robin (the adoption coordinator for COTP) today:

All that is left is for INS to send up the letter from the birth parent interview to the consulate. Daryl said to start calling the consulate on Tue to ask if they have everything. If they say "yes" then ask if you can make your appointment . We are in the home stretch. :)

Almost there!!!

Carnaval

2008-02-05T17:37:00.000-05:00

Most offices in Haiti are closed this week because of Carnaval (it's like Mardi Gras). So, we're not expecting to hear anything until at least next week. It would be nice if I could hear some good news for my birthday on Monday, but I'm guessing that's too early to expect any news.

Waiting...patiently...well, as patiently as I can...

A Bit Closer

2008-02-01T20:55:00.000-05:00

Noah had his birth parent interview on Wednesday. It was a long day (they didn't get in until 6 PM), but it went well. Now, we just have to wait for the visa appointment. I'm not really sure how long the wait will be at this point, but we're hoping things will move quickly.

We had a bit of a scare with our passports - it turns out that you can't travel to Haiti on a passport that expires less than 3-6 months from the travel date. Our passports expire in mid-March. If you are going to travel in two weeks or less, you can get an emergency passport, but you are supposed to have either a confirmed ticket or a letter from a company stating the necessity for business travel. Of course, we had neither of those. But, the last couple of families who traveled to COTP to pick up their kids only had one or two days notice to book their travel - that wouldn't be enough time to get even an emergency passport. So, we decided to have Robin, the adoption coordinator for COTP, write us a letter and we hoped that the passport office would accept that in lieu of a letter from a company for business travel. But, we were very nervous that they would be sticklers and they wouldn't allow it. Luckily, we had no problems and were able to get the renewal. Scott's passport came today and mine should be here on Monday. Phew!

So, two things that happened on the same day and they both actually went right! We're on a roll!

And Found Again

2008-01-24T18:04:00.000-05:00

Noah's I600 made it to Haiti!! COTP has gotten a birth parent interview scheduled for Monday, but the flight to PAP is full, so they're trying to see if they can get on the flight somehow. Please pray that they can get on the flight so that they can get to the appointment on Monday.

One step closer...

Still Waiting

2008-01-23T10:48:00.000-05:00

Well, there's not much to report, unfortunately. I spoke with the Haitian consulate yesterday and they still haven't received my I600 approval. According to DHL, a package should only take about 3 days to get to Haiti - it's been a week now. I know I should be more patient, but it seems impossible right now. I just want to get our boy home!

Progress

2008-01-16T14:39:00.000-05:00

Well, I spoke with the NVC today and, amazingly, they actually received my file. In fact, they sent it out to Haiti via DHL yesterday. Thank you, God!! We are praying that we don't hit anymore speed bumps and that we will be able to pick Noah up in the next couple of weeks.

We'll let you know!

Lost and Found

2008-01-08T15:52:00.000-05:00

Well, my file has been found!! This is a wonderful thing, but it also makes me want to scream because of the complete incompetence of the Chicago USCIS office (okay - being honest here - after I got off the phone, I did scream). Turns out, they never sent it. Yep, you read that right - hard to believe yet another mistake could have been made with my file, but apparently the incompetence of USCIS knows no bounds.

When I spoke to the officer yesterday on the phone, she assured me that my file had been sent. That they are always sent the next day. After much cajoling, she finally agreed to have a clerk look at my file and make sure (I tried to convince her to do it herself while I was on the phone, but she couldn't be bothered with this). She took my phone number and said that she would have a clerk look at it and then she would call me back.

Of course, she never called. Finally, this afternoon, I called her back and she said, "Oh, I found out that it was never sent. I forgot to call you." Just like that. I wish I would have had the foresight to tell her yesterday that I would pay to have the file overnighted if it was found. Since she never called me, it had already been sent out and it was too late. She assured me that it would only take a week or so to get to NVC (funny, yesterday she was insisting that it could take up to four weeks). Scott and my mom both reassured me that it wouldn't have mattered if I had offered to pay for overnight shipping. She's not the helpful type - she would have just said, "That's not how we do it." I'm guessing they're right.

The truly frustrating thing about this whole ordeal is that I have never once gotten a single "I'm sorry" for anything that has happened with my file. Apparently, the US government has no need for customer service because, let's face it, it's not like I can switch to another vendor. (Hmmm... Canada sounds good about now). And obviously the officer working at USCIS Chicago doesn't have the human decency to come up with an "I'm sorry" without a customer service policy forcing her to do so. When my file was approved back in June and then that approval was rescinded, they simply sent me an email stating that the approval had been given in error. No, "I'm sorry for any inconvenience this has caused." Nothing. Then, when the officer gave me incorrect information on what was needed in order to approve my file (which caused months of delay), again, I was never offered a simple apology. USCIS Chicago never sent my letter to USCIS Haiti to let them know that I had opted out of the AOF program. They also never showed an ounce of regret. After all of this, they forget to send my file. You would think that the office would feel horrible that yet another mistake had been made. If it were me in her position, I would have said, "I am SO sorry that this happened and that your file was delayed yet again." Go back and read what she actually said in the third paragraph. It's pretty much verbatim.

Every time I spoke to this officer and explained to her that my son had had a passport since the beginning of November and that this approval was the only thing holding me up, she would respond with a completely non-committal, unsympathetic reply. Usually, she would suggest that we should just "wait" for some paperwork or other from Haiti (which was never coming - I talked to the people in Haiti and they had no idea what she was talking about and said there is no reason that she shouldn't give me the approval if I had opted out of the AOF program). She even chuckled once at the fact that she was waiting on Haiti and Haiti was waiting on her. So very amusing that my son was stuck in limbo due to her incompetence! She would repeatedly tell me that she would check on something and then call me back - She never once called me back during this process. I've been treated as though my child coming home is completely unimportant - like I've been waiting for a baby doll instead of an actual child. What's a few more months, right?

A few more months in the life of a three-year-old child. It's a lot.

Trials and Tribulations

2008-01-07T16:46:00.000-05:00

More bad news I'm afraid. The National Visa Center has not received our I600 approval yet. Of course, everyone I've talked to is trying to tell me that it could take up to four weeks to get to New Hampshire, but you can tell they're just trying to sound positive. Everyone says, "Well, yes, it really should have gotten there by now, but you never know - it could take longer". The woman at NVC that I spoke to told me to call USCIS Chicago. I did, but the officer was not very helpful (not that I expected her to be). She basically told me that there's nothing she can do. They don't have copies of anything from the file and NVC needs the physical file before they can do anything. So, once again, we're stuck.

Please pray that the file will make its way to NVC SOON!!

Good News at Last!!

2007-12-21T10:27:00.000-05:00

I got an email back from USCIS last Thursday saying that a decision would be made on my file within the week. I was extremely happy to get any response at all from them, since I knew that the officer was on vacation until the 20th. That meant that someone in the office was at least responding finally.

Well, as of yesterday, I hadn't heard anything. I wasn't terribly surprised. Since the officer was supposed to be back in the office yesterday, I replied to the email I had received and asked if anything had been done. I also called the office (three times), but, of course, never got an answer. I left a message and felt defeated - yet another message - sure to be ignored.

Well, today I got an email from USCIS saying that MY APPROVAL HAD BEEN CABLED TO HAITI on the 19th!!! Hip, hip hooray!!

Scott said "Maybe it was good that the officer was on vacation because someone else finally took care of our file." One way or the other, I'm thrilled.

So - next steps. I'm going to call the consulate today and see if they will now schedule the birth parent interview. The medical appointment is already done. After the birth parent interview, we will have a visa appointment. The day of the visa appointment is the day that we bring our boy home!!

Things are looking up!! Thank you God!

Out of Office Autoreply

2007-12-10T18:22:00.000-05:00

That's what I got just now when I emailed USCIS again (read the post below for this morning's USCIS drama). Apparently, the reason I haven't heard back from the Chicago USCIS officer is because she's out of the office - from DEC 3rd to DEC 20th!!!! Not that she got back to me before the 3rd either, but that explains this latest round of silence. In her out of office email, she gives a number to call if you need to contact someone in her absence - Ironically, the number she gives is her own office number - the number I've been calling for more than a week with no answer. Obviously, no one is listening to her messages or handling her workload. That's three weeks where no one is even attempting to solve the problems that this officer has created. I know - I'm starting to sound spiteful. I just can't help it at this point.

Before I received the news about the officer's vacation, I called Senator Durbin's office again. I decided that it was just ridiculous that in two weeks my case hadn't even been assigned to anyone and I begged to just talk to someone who could help me. I did end up speaking to the person who handles international adoption cases. She said that she corresponds with the officer via email and would let me know when she hears back. I was feeling hopeful that I might at least hear something when I decided to email the office myself as well. That's when I got the out of office reply. I had to decide whether to scream or cry - I chose cry. It's looking like nothing will be done on my file until after the holidays. I guess we might not have Noah home in January after all.

Still Nothing

2007-12-10T15:02:00.000-05:00

Okay, this is getting beyond frustrating. I finally got ahold of the consulate in Haiti last Thursday and they told me that the person I needed to speak to was on vacation until Monday. I then called back again today and the consulate told me I needed to call USCIS in Haiti instead. I did get ahold of someone in USCIS. They never got anything from the Chicago office stating that I had opted out of the AOF program. As far as they knew, they were still waiting for documentation from the orphanage so that they could conduct the orphan investigation. I'm guessing that, since the Chicago office had mistakenly had my file marked as approved (instead of pending), they never even sent it. The Haiti office said that the Chicago office needs to send them the letter and then adjudicate the I600 themselves (which is what they were supposed to be doing all along). She gave me their email address to give to the Chicago office.

Now, for more frustration, though. The officer in the Chicago office DOES NOT ANSWER HER PHONE. She also DOES NOT RETURN MY CALLS!!!! I called her at least a dozen times today with no luck.

I tried calling Senator Durbin's office again and was informed that my case hadn't been assigned to anyone yet (it's been one day shy of two weeks since I faxed my letter) - she said to call back in a couple of days if I still hadn't heard anything. Can I scream now?? Why is it that dealing with the US government is just as hard as dealing with the Haitian government? Haiti has lots of excuses - shoddy electrical system, no computer system to speak of, poor road systems - what excuse does the US government have?

Okay, I'm done with my rant for now. I guess I'll go back to calling the USCIS Chicago office another dozen times. Sigh...

No News is... Bad News

2007-12-04T21:54:00.000-05:00

Well, I know the famous phrase says that no news is good news, but I'm afraid it's wrong. I still haven't heard anything from Senator Durbin's office or from USCIS. I call USCIS every day and leave a message, but the officer never calls back. It's so frustrating. She was simply supposed to get me the name of someone to call at the consulate in Haiti (I've tried calling there without a specific name since and haven't been able to get through) - Somehow, she can't even manage that. I called the Senator's office and they said my file is being actively worked on and that they will let me know when they hear anything. So, I wait. No news is definitely bad news.

You'd think I'd be used to it. But, I have to mail a Christmas present to Noah. I've been avoiding it. I had been so hoping that he would be home with us, opening presents here on Christmas. I have to face that it's not going to happen.

In some ways, it might be better for Noah. He's a shy little boy and the hubbub of Christmas might be a bit overwhelming for him. I just have to keep reminding myself of this fact. I'm actually okay with it most of the time, but if things don't start moving again soon, I think I'll go a bit insane. Heck, I'm already halfway there. The US government doesn't want to have that responsibility on its shoulders, right? Okay, USCIS, get moving!!

USCIS Woes

2007-11-27T18:47:00.000-05:00

Things are not going well on the I-600 front. I contacted my Senator Durbin's office today and they had me fax a letter requesting help. Here's what the letter said:

I am currently in the process of adopting a child from Haiti. Our son has his passport and is ready to come home, but I have been experiencing issues with getting the I-600 approval needed so that he can get a visa. I am hoping that perhaps Senator Durbin’s office can speak to USCIS in Chicago on my behalf so that the I-600 approval can be expedited.

I applied for the I-600 on May 1st, 2007. At that time, I asked to be included in the AOF (adjudicate orphan first) program. In July, I received a letter stating that my son, Louines, had his I-600 approval. However, I noticed that the visa classification was incorrect (IR-4 rather than IR-3). When I emailed USCIS to inquire about this, I was told that Louines had received his I-600 approval in error and that it would be revoked. I was told that, since I had opted into the AOF program, I could not get my I-600 approval until the Chicago office received form I-604 from Haiti.

Meanwhile, I spoke with someone at the USCIS office in Haiti who informed me that I should not have participated in the AOF program because my son already had an adoption decree. I immediately called the Chicago office and asked them if I could opt out of the AOF program and asked what documentation I would need to submit in order to get my I-600 approval from the Chicago office. The officer informed me that I would need to submit a copy of my son’s adoption decree and a letter asking to opt out of the AOF program.

On Sept. 6th, I faxed these documents to the Chicago office. The fax was apparently not received and I faxed them again on Sept 13th. An officer emailed me and informed me that I also needed to submit Louines’ IBESR authorization of adoption in order to get I-600 approval. This document had never been mentioned to me in past conversations and I did not have a copy. Because I had opted out of the AOF program, I now needed this document in order to get approval.

I was not able to get a copy of the document until my son’s passport was printed and the file was returned to my orphanage. As you can imagine, I was now incredibly anxious to submit the document to USCIS and receive the I-600 approval. I emailed and called the USCIS office several times both before and after submitting the document in order to find out if anything further was necessary in order to receive my son’s approval. I never received a reply.

Today, I received word from the consulate in Haiti (via my son’s orphanage) that my son’s birth parent interview cannot be scheduled until the I-600 approval is received. I called the USCIS office once again and this time was able to speak to the officer. She was very confused about the state of my file. First she said that it had been approved in July. When I explained that the approval had been revoked, she then said that they were waiting for the orphan investigation results to come back from Haiti. I reminded her that I had opted out of the AOF program and told her that the consulate’s office had informed us that they would not begin the orphan investigation until we received the I-600 approval. She then said that she needed a letter from the consulate saying that she could give the I-600 approval without the orphan investigation. She indicated that she had requested this letter, but I honestly don’t believe that this could be true, since, at the start of my call, she seemed to think that I had already received approval. Overall, she just seemed confused about what needed to be done. I asked if there was someone at the consulate that I could call to make sure that this letter gets sent. She said that she would call me back with a name. That was this morning. I, unfortunately do not have much confidence that this matter will be settled anytime soon.

I am sorry for this long explanation, but I wanted you to understand what has happened so far - what I have already done to try to rectify the situation myself. I am hoping that someone in the Senator’s office can help me with this matter. I am hoping that the I-600 approval and the scheduling of the birth parent interview can be expedited so that we can get our son home. Noah (as we will name Louines) has been in hearts since we first visited him in October 2005 and has legally (in Haiti) been our son since February 2007 – I’m sure you can understand that we are heart-sick with waiting and just want him home soon.

Thank you so much for your help!
Nicole Hewitt

Documentation

2007-11-14T22:43:00.000-05:00

Okay, so I got the document that I needed for my I-600 approval from COTP today. I sent it to our translator and she was able to turn it right around and get it back to me tonight - thank you, Deb Blaz! Tomorrow, I will fax the document to USCIS in Chicago and hopefully they will get working on my I-600 approval!

I'm a bit frustrated because USCIS hasn't returned my recent emails or phone calls. I've been trying to get verification from them that this document is the ONLY thing that is still needed for my approval. The last time I spoke to someone there, she made it sound like I would just need the adoption decree and then I could be approved. I submitted that and thought I was all set. So I was very surprised (and upset) to hear later that they needed the IBESR approval as well. Needless to say, I don't want any surprises this time.

That's about all the update I can give right now. We still have the birth parent interview and the medical exam and then the visa appointment to go. But, we're moving forward and that's what counts.

As far as the birth parent interview goes, Robin told me today that for some reason it's being done a little differently and will be done at the consulate. They're not sure why USCIS requested it this way, but please pray that this is a positive thing and not negative. I should be hearing soon when the appointment is scheduled.

It's real - He's coming home!!!!

Noah has a passport!

2007-11-13T10:40:00.000-05:00

Wow! We're getting closer!! I just got a call from Robin saying that Daryl at COTP has Noah's passport. I'm still waiting to hear for sure that they have a copy of the document that I need for USCIS, but it's looking good. Hopefully I can get that faxed to them in the next day or two and we can keep moving along!

Please be praying that these final details move along smoothly. There's a lot that has to happen still, not the least of which is getting Noah's I-600 approval. Please pray that that happens quickly because I'm not sure that anything else can happen until we get that approval.

I'm just so happy to report that things are moving!! We may have our boy home for Christmas yet!!

Noah is out of MOI!!!

2007-10-29T14:01:00.000-05:00

Yes, it's true. We are finally out of MOI!! I just got the news today and I almost can't believe it. We're out!!

As it turns out, we've been out since the 19th and Robin just didn't want to let us know the news until she had absolute confirmation (which I definitely appreciate - if it had turned out to not be true, I would be completely devastated right now instead of overjoyed). Unfortunately, they were still not able to get the document that I need for my I600 approval because my file went directly from MOI to immigration and was never in NLL's hands. So, here's what still needs to happen for Noah to come home (at least as far as I understand it):

Passport printed (this hasn't been taking long lately, so hopefully it will be soon).

Once the passport is printed, I will get a copy of the IBESR approval, which is what I need for my I-600 approval. I will submit that document to USCIS, and hopefully they will do the rest of their processing quickly.

Visa application is filed. I don't remember everything that is involved in this, but I do know that Noah has to have a medical exam and I think that they do a birthparent interview at this point. Once we have visa approval, we go to Haiti for the visa appointment and to bring our son home!!

Things have been moving relatively smoothly post-MOI. I am optimistic that Noah will be home with us for Christmas this year!!

Please keep praying!

Nicole.

Happy Birthday, Noah (Not So Happy for Mommy)

2007-10-01T17:30:00.000-04:00

Today is Noah's 3rd birthday. I have to admit that I'm having a hard time celebrating. Last year, we had a little party for Noah on his birthday. It was nice for Jaden and Danielle to mark the day and for us to celebrate Noah being part of our family. This year, I just can't bring myself to do it. I can't manage to be anything but sad today. I can't believe how much he's growing up without us. We just had no idea that things would take this long, that our little boy would pass up toddlerhood and we wouldn't be there to see it happen.

People often ask if anything new is happening with the adoption. The answer is no. We are still stuck in the same place we've been since the beginning of March. It's hard to say when we might hear news. Could be tomorrow, but I've been saying that for months. We still haven't been able to get I600 approval yet either. When I finally got a copy of the adoption decree and sent it in, they informed me that they also need our IBESR approval document. No one has a copy of that, so we'll have to wait until Noah gets out of MOI and hope that USCIS processes things quickly. I've pretty much given up hope that anything will happen quickly.

Happy birthday, Noah. We love you and miss you!

Life Goes On

2007-09-09T22:36:00.001-04:00

It's been awhile since I've posted. Mostly because I haven't had anything to say that relates to the adoption (or to Haiti in general). But, even though I started this blog to write about the adoption and Ruthlande, life goes on. Life here goes on. No reason why I shouldn't write about it, right?

So, it's been a big month in the Hewitt household. Jaden started kindergarten. He's been loving it, which I knew he would. He's definitely ready for this step and I'm excited about all the things he'll get to learn and experience!

Also moving up in the world is Danielle, who started preschool last week. She's always had a more timid personality and I worry a bit more about how she's going to adjust. But, so far so good!!

It's been nice to spend mornings with Danielle - just the two of us. I guess this is one small benefit to not having Noah home yet - I get some individual time with Danielle in the mornings and with Jaden on the two afternoons that Danielle is in preschool. I'm trying to look on the bright side of things after all, and if Noah was home right now, this time would be focused on him adjusting to life in our family. In some ways, I think that it's nice that that adjustment isn't happening at the same time that Jaden and Danielle are adjusting to their new school routines. (Of course, if Noah had come home months ago as we were hoping, those adjustments wouldn't have had to come at the same time. But, then I still wouldn't have one-on-one time with Jaden and Danielle - focus on the positive, Nicole!).

One positive thing about the adoption - I did get a copy of Noah's adoption decree and faxed it to the Chicago USCIS office. Hopefully I'll get that elusive I-600 approval (again). I'm not holding my breath at this point, though. I won't truly believe it until I get the letter - and even then, I might still have my doubts. This process sure has squelched my normally optimistic spirit. Now, if we could just hear those sweet words, "Noah is out of MOI." Some days it feels like it will never happen. According to the adoption decree, Noah has been our son since February 16th. February 16th. Danielle has started randomly making comments - "It's taking Noah a very long time to come home." Don't I know it, baby. Don't I know it.

Color-Blindness is in the Eye of the Beholder

2007-08-17T23:00:00.000-04:00

So, I've been obsessed with reading blogs lately. Some of you reading this now can probably relate. Somehow (I don't even remember how anymore), I found a blog written by a TRA - a trans-racial adoptee - and now I can't stop reading them. It's been fascinating and frightening and enlightening and a million other things that I just can't describe.

When we started this adoption process, we decided that race "didn't matter" to us. We felt led to adopt a deaf child - a child who might not easily find another family and who probably wouldn't have a chance for a great life in their home country. We wanted a child who was relatively young, but we didn't care about race or gender.

What I've come to realize is that the only reason that I'm able to take this color-blind position is because I'm white. I see little direct evidence of racism and what I do see is easy for me to write off as ignorance. It's easy for me to be color-blind. However, my black son won't have that luxury. Race may not "matter" to us, but it will matter to him - it will be a part of who he is - a part of how he experiences life. No amount of love and wishing will make that fact go away. So, what does that mean? How do I raise my child to understand a part of himself that I've never experienced, that I can't share? How do I give him a sense of identity so that he doesn't grow up wishing that those well-meaning white folks hadn't messed up his life by adopting him?

That's why I'm reading - voraciously. I find myself desperate to do the "right" things for my child. And I know there are no definitive answers. But, I feel like I can learn from the experiences of those who have been there, done that.

I know in my heart that Noah was meant for our family. God has showed that to me in a thousand ways. Scott and I have often chuckled at the fact that we set out to adopt a deaf child and it looks like Noah has no hearing problems at all. We've also realized that, since Noah was believed to be deaf, only a family that was willing to adopt a deaf child would have accepted his referral. God gave us willing hearts and led us to our child. Still, I have to remember that just because I know that God is in control, doesn't mean that I can sit back and assume everything will just work out fine. Life doesn't work that way. We're going to have to work at this family thing. We're going to have to live and learn and probably make a bunch of mistakes along the way.

Is it terrifying? Sure. Is it worth it? I guess you'll have to ask me in 20 years or so, but right now, I can't imagine an answer other than, "Absolutely."

Some MOI Movement (and Articles on Ruthlande)

2007-08-13T11:09:00.000-04:00

Well, there has been some recent movement in MOI. This past week, several people on the Yahoo Groups that I belong to have reported that they are out of MOI. They should be picking up their kiddos in a month or two. This includes one child from COTP!

It's great to see movement - it means that at least something is happening - but I have to admit that it's bittersweet. The people who have come out of MOI recently all went in after we did. It's hard not to wonder if something has happened with our file. Has a problem been found with the file? Is it in a pile somewhere, pushed off to the side? I've heard stories about the disorganization of the offices and it's not hard to believe that this could happen. A few files have even been lost!

At this point, I've given up hope of getting my I-600 approved until I get my adoption decree from Haiti. And I've given up hope of getting the adoption decree until Noah's file comes out of MOI (Robin at COTP has been trying to find out if NLL, who is facilitating our adoption, has a copy of the adoption decree, but so far we haven't been able to get word about that). I'm really just hoping at this point that we get out of MOI very soon, that we're able to get the adoption decree to USCIS, and that USCIS will approve my I-600 quickly.

I do have to remember some of the good that has come from the waiting. We probably wouldn't have felt capable of taking Ruthlande in if Noah had come home recently. And this second trip to Haiti felt like God's plan for lots of reasons that I won't go into. Still, it's hard to be patient when God is telling me to just wait. Patience has never been one of my defining qualities. Guess I have plenty of time to continue working on that...

On a brighter note, here's a link to an article that was written about Ruthlande in the Daily Herald: http://www.dailyherald.com/search/searchstory.asp?id=339724

Also, another article written in our local paper by the Pioneer Press (the picture is from this article): http://www.pioneerlocal.com/libertyville/news/485018,li-medvisa-072607-s1.article

Enjoy!

Chance to win $2500

2007-08-10T18:33:00.000-04:00

Okay, so there's almost no chance that I'll win this, but what the heck, right?

Over at Ashwin’s blog, you will find one crazy blog owner!! You can win $2500!! To enter just copy this text and paste it in your blog!! But hurry, this competition will not last long! So get posting!

Happy Birthday to Scott?

2007-08-08T16:43:00.000-04:00

Okay, so yesterday was Scott's birthday and what a day it turned out to be! Not exactly the happy birthday we were hoping for. Let's see - the "day" started at 3 AM when we awoke to the sound of a massive storm - pouring rain, lightning and the strangest, loudest thunder I think I've ever heard. Scott got up to check on things and found that our basement window was leaking water. We're in the process of getting our siding replaced and so all of the gutters are off of the house. With no gutters, the window well had filled completely up and the window was leaking. Luckily, Scott had found the problem early enough - the basement just had a bit of water and Scott was able to caulk the window and stop the leaking.

Problem averted, right? Well, then we looked out the front door and realized that a MUCH bigger problem was awaiting us. I'm sure you've seen the picture above and can figure out what I'm referring to. Because the siding was in the driveway, Scott had parked at the end of the drive instead of at the front where he normally does. He was kicking himself because he had thought of moving the car at one point, but then didn't because he thought I might want to go somewhere in the morning (and I can't move his car because I'm incapable of driving stick shift). Well, when it rains hard, the sewers in front of our house tend to back up and the road floods. I can't tell you how many countless times we've seen cars get stuck in the flood right in front of our house - we're always amazed at how many people drive through even when they see someone stuck!

This night was the worst flooding we had ever seen. The water came halfway up our front yard and the water was up past the doors on Scott's car. The inside was full of water as well. At that point, Scott decided it was too late to do anything but wait for the water to recede.

So, Scott spent most of his birthday taking the seats and carpet out of his car so he could dry them out. He said he vacuumed over 20 gallons of water out of the car (maybe approaching 30). We're now thinking we might want to invest in a new car - we had been thinking about it anyway, since we can't fit three carseats in Scott's car - but we don't really have the money right now, so we were holding off. Guess we might be revisiting that decision. We just don't know how well we'll be able to trust this car now. Scott drove it and the battery light kept coming on and he thought the transmission felt a little funny. So, we'll see. We went out and test drove a Kia Rondo last night. We'll see...

Other than that, we also had the I-600 issue come up yesterday. It just wasn't the best day overall. But, that's how life is sometimes. Even on birthdays.

Clarification on I-600 Woes

2007-08-07T22:28:00.000-04:00

I got some questions on this and realized that I didn't explain the situation with the I-600 very well. It turns out that the I-600 should never have been approved. It was approved in error apparently. They said that they needed to get the results of the orphan investigation from Haiti (which hasn't been started yet, as far as I know) before they can approve my I-600. Here's the actual email that I received.

Nicole,

The orphan unit has reviewed your file. The I-600 approval was issued in error. USCIS in Chicago is waiting for the DOS or CIS overseas office to conduct the investigation (Form I-604). Once we receive their results, we will go ahead and adjudicate the I-600 petition. For now, the orphan unit will cancel the IR4 visa that was issued to you and the consulate/embassy abroad.

Thank you,

Lisa Ubaldo

So, the frustrating thing is that I'm back at square one as far as the I-600 is concerned. One step forward, two steps back.

:-(

I-600 Woes

2007-08-07T15:38:00.000-04:00

Well, unfortunately, I have to take back the encouraging news I shared the other day about our I-600. I got an email from USCIS today saying that my I-600 approval was given to me in error and that they are CANCELLING the visa that was issued to me!!

I had emailed USCIS because I was given the wrong visa classification (IR4 when I should have gotten an IR3 since Scott and I both visited Noah). In Illinois, you have to have a foster care license if you get an IR4 visa, which we don't have. But, now I'm wishing I'd never inquired about it - I never imagined that they would take the visa back!

Trying hard not to sit here and cry, but it always feels like one step forward, two steps back lately. Please pray for the approval to come soon and for my sanity and patience while we wait.

Pictures of Haiti

2007-08-06T09:14:00.000-04:00

Life After Haiti (& I-600 Approval!)

2007-08-05T21:31:00.000-04:00

Well, I haven't written in the past few days because things have been hectic around here. Jaden has pink eye in both eyes and an ear infection. Now, it seems that Danielle and I have caught his cold (not the pink eye so far, though!). It's just been hard to get back into the swing of things with all of this.

But, I did have some good news on the adoption front this week. I got a letter in the mail saying that Noah's I-600 was approved!! This is a major relief for me because last I had heard, we couldn't get our I-600 approval without the adoption decree (which we don't have) or the birth parent interview (which hadn't been scheduled yet). I was amazed to get that approval in the mail! Turns out that rumors that the birth parent interview was no longer needed must have been true. I don't give rumors much credit until I have proof (lots of them turn out to be wrong) - but I guess this one panned out!

Well, I'm posting some more pictures from my trip. For confidentiality reasons, I can't post pictures of all of the kids, but I'll post a few that just involve me and Noah.

Noah & Mommy

2007-08-03T18:49:00.001-04:00

Responses to Comments

2007-08-03T17:34:00.000-04:00

Okay, I can't figure out the best way to respond to people's questions that they've asked in comments (I'm afraid that if I just leave another comment people won't see them), so I figured I'd just create a new blog entry for them. So, here goes:

Ericka: Thanks so much for sending a box of things to Ruthlande's family! I know they will be thrilled with everything that you send. The only specific thing that they asked for is an exersaucer-type thing with wheels, so I'm going to look into that to see if I can find one and send it to her. I'll give you a call sometime this week to talk to you about the trip (things have been hectic since I got home - Jaden has pink eye in both eyes and an ear infection!)

Lori: Chrislande hadn't received her picture book yet as of when I left, but I know that mail can be very slow, so I wouldn't worry unless you sent it more than two weeks ago. It's possible they could have gotten it in this past Wednesday's mail - you should just check with them.

Sarah: The "a" in Landie's name is more of an "ah" sound - like you said, imagine a French accent. It sounds similar to Lindsay, but with an "ah" sound.

Svetik: Matthew is a sweetie. He was one of the kids who was not too wild and not too shy. The one story I can think of is how he tried to sneak into getting to play with bubbles twice. Lots of times, the kids tried to take advantage of the fact that I didn't know all of them terribly well. When it was time for bubbles, they would all try to pretend that they hadn't had a turn yet. I had to ask him his name to be sure, but when he told me Matthew I said, "You already had a turn Matthew!" But, when I got back to the bubbles, there he was again - I was thinking, "Wait, aren't you Matthew? Are you trying to sneak another turn?" It was cute. I had to send him back again, but he took it well. It can't hurt to try, right?

Amy K: I saw the boys' books while I was at COTP. All of the books are on one big shelf and most of the kids know right where to go to find theirs. They go over to the shelf and pull their book off themselves! Sammy and Jonas are both such cuties, although, I must admit I kept getting Jonas and Jeffley confused. They look a lot alike!!

Heidi: It's so nice to "meet" you. Ruth is a real sweetie!! Luckily, Katie and Maria noticed right away when Ruth started to seem sick and they wasted no time bringing her to the hospital. She never got really bad (she drank a full bottle while I was holding her at the hospital, waiting to be admitted). It's great that we have people who are paying so much attention to the health and well-being of our kids. From what I heard, Ruth was already doing much better by the time I left Haiti. Of course, Yanise still needs our prayers. She got much sicker, more quickly, poor thing!

Carlyn: I'm so sorry, but I honestly didn't spend enough time in the baby rooms to be able to learn much about their individual personalities. They were a cute bunch, though - all trying to get to me to get my camera as I was taking pictures. I do know that I got at least a couple of pictures of Reggie, though. I'll be sending them out to people as I can.

Kim: Again, I wasn't able to get a specific impression of most of the babies (see my note to Carlyn). I'm sorry about that! I'm very glad to hear that you've been blessed with helping your friend with the two babies here on medical visas, though - I hope that you're able to escort them home and visit Elijah for yourself! It will be a visit you won't forget!

The Long Journey Home - Days 8 & 9!!

2007-08-02T12:47:00.000-04:00

Oops! There wasn't supposed to be a day 9!! Travel didn't go as smoothly as I had hoped.

But, I'll start back at Day 8. I was up a lot the night before because Niki was up quite a few times in the night. I was also suffering from an upset stomach and was sick in the morning. I ended up taking some Immodium because I really feared that 3 hour Lynx plane trip with no bathroom! Of course, it's some kind of unwritten law that you have to get sick just before you get on one of those planes!!

Anyway, I made one last trip out to the baby house and said my goodbyes to Noah. It was hard, of course, but I just have to pray that I'm back to get him soon. I am so glad that I got the opportunity to see how well he's doing and to get another glimpse at what life is like for our kids. I would highly recommend making the trip out to COTP when you go to pick your kids up so that you can see for yourself.

We left for the airport and then I had a long period of just sitting. It turned out, my plane left over an hour late. When I found this out, I was concerned because I only had two hours between my flights (this was the last flight out of FLL to Chicago). I was still hoping and praying that I could get through customs quickly, though and still make my flight. Well, apparently, the Lynx flight took longer than planned because we didn't get off our plane at Ft. Lauderdale until 8:40 PM - my Spirit Airlines flight was supposed to have taken off at 8:20 PM!! I'm not sure how the flight took so much longer than planned, but there were storms in Ft. Lauderdale, so that might have been the reason. At any rate, I had obviously missed my flight. Turns out, Scott knew that I had missed the flight and had been trying to call Spirit for the past hour, but wasn't getting any answer. He tried to look online see if there was another Spirit flight that I could take, but the next flight wasn't until 24 hours later and it was completely booked! I wouldn't be able to get a seat out on Spirit until Friday night! When I got to the ticket counters at Spirit, it was a madhouse! There were mobs of people and only a few employees at the counters. I got into one line to find out if I could re-book, only to find when I got to the front that I was in the wrong line. I had to get in the back of a different, incredibly long line. After 40 minutes of waiting, I had only moved up a few spots. At that point, Scott decided to just book me a flight on United for the next day. He said he was watching as seats were going away and prices were going up - we couldn't wait for me to get to the front of the Spirit line. By this time, I was more than stressed out. Between having gotten very little sleep the night before, having not eaten anything but bread with peanut butter all day and still having a bit of an upset stomach, I think I was beyond my breaking point.

At that point, I went to my hotel room and got some sleep. I spent most of Day 9 in the airport. I tried to see if I could get a voucher from Spirit for a future flight, but found out (after standing in line for over an hour) that they wouldn't do it. They said that they weren't responsible for the Lynx flight being late, so I couldn't do anything. I could have re-booked, but, of course, I had already booked the American flight and I already knew that I couldn't get a flight out until Friday anyway. So, the money for that ticket was just lost. I won't book with Spirit again. Between the madness at the airport, the fact that no one would answer the phone and the fact that they have so few flights (so, if you miss one, you might have to wait days to catch another), it's just not worth it. Going to the AA ticket counter was like a breath of fresh air after the craziness at Spirit.

Anyway, I got home safe and sound, if a bit weary. I was so excited to see Jaden and Danielle again! Even though Jaden was asleep when I got home, I ended up waking him up so that I could talk to him. Of course, the kids then didn't want to go to bed. They ended up staying up until 10:30!! Jaden was really cute. He said, "Mommy I missed you so much. Even though I had the Mama Chante video, it didn't work. I still missed you!" It was so sweet! It felt so nice to just hang out with my kiddos again. I can't wait until Noah is home with us so that he can be a part of that too!

More Observations on the Kids

2007-07-30T21:19:00.000-04:00

Today, we played outside with tinker toys and then later put out the kiddie pools again. Lots of fun! I definitely find that I get overwhelmed with the kids when I have too many at once, though. It's fine with the pools because they all stay there and don't try to wander away, but with the tinker toys, it was hard to keep them from heading off with pieces in their hands. I kept trying to get them to stay sitting, but it's no small task. I always start out with just a few kids and then they magically multiply until I have too many to handle! I don't know how the nannies do it! Anyway, here are some more observations:

Woodson and Geoff: Woodson and Geoff were such good boys while we were playing with the tinker toys. They were the only ones that I didn't have to keep chasing around. They got to play the longest since they were being so good (the other kids got rotated, but I didn't make them leave since they were playing so nicely). Woodson was really funny. He started hitting the ground with one of the tinker toys like a hammer and singing, "Bob the Builder - Can we fix it? Bob the Builder - Yes we can!" It was VERY cute!

Thania: Thania was also cute while we were playing with the tinker toys. She was mostly using them as drumsticks, using the metal container as a drum. She was also very intent on picking up all of the tinker toys and putting them back into the container! In the pool, Thania's favorite thing to do was to use the hose to spray the other kids (which none of them minded - there's not much water pressure). She spent the entire time in the pool with that hose in her hand!

Kassandra (not Robert's sister - the other Kassandra): She was such a sweetie at pool time. At one point, she thought she had to get out and said to me, "Fini?" I told her no and gestured that she could go back to the pool. She got this elated look on her face and RAN back as fast as she could. Later, when it was time to get out, I dried her off and she headed back toward the play area. All of a sudden, she turned back around, ran to me, gave me a kiss and then headed back again. It was so adorable! Hard not to be won over by that!!

Jesse: He knows how to get what he wants around here. Since he speaks the best English, he probably gets the most attention from the visiting volunteers - He's cute and he knows it! He sat on my lap today while I read him several books. I'm really amazed at how much he understands. I even use him to translate for me sometimes!

Landie (which is pronounced "Lahndzy" by the way): She is such a big, tough girl! She definitely holds her own among the boys in the Boat room. At one point, one of them started pestering her and she just nonchalantly thrust out her arm, knocking him right over. It didn't faze her a bit!

Lily: Lily took some time to warm up to me. She's a bit shy and when I first came, she would look at me with this scowl on her face, as if to say, "Who do you think you are?" She's also too shy to pose and smile for pictures (at least for me). But, after I was here for a day or so, she got used to me and smiled and came over to me when she would see me come into the baby house, so I guess I won her over!

Isabel: She is such a fun and energetic girl! She had so much fun in the pool, pouring water over her head and splashing in the water. She can hold her own with the boys too - even the bigger ones. And, wow, could she get any cuter?!

Jack: I wish I'd gotten to know Jack a bit better while I was here. Somehow, he always seemed to be off somewhere where I wasn't. I found out an interesting bit of information about him, though. He and Noah are related! Apparently, Jack's mother and Noah's father are cousins (so they would be second cousins). No one here knew that - Noah's mother often comes with Jack's grandmother, but no one realized they were related (at least not as far as Katie knew).

Makenzie: He was funny in the pool. He started balancing a full glass of water on his head, showing off. He was actually very good at it!! Of course, then all of the other kids had to balance cups of water on their heads too, but I think Makenzie was the best at it. It was a hoot!

Fresnel: Fresnel is quite the little jokester. He kept throwing water at Maria and he thought it was so funny! Maria says he always has quite the sense of humor! He really had such a fun time splashing around in the water. It was great to see!

Chelda: Chelda also has a fun sense of humor. At one point, Nelson pulled off my glasses and tried to run away and she just laughed and laughed! She thought it was hilarious!! It really cracked me up. It was great to see her interact with the other kids.

Well, I think that's all for tonight. If I didn't write anything about your child, please feel free to leave a comment and ask about them. I've tried to write about as many as I could, but it's hard to keep track of all of them. Unfortunately, I didn't spend much time with the younger babies, so I can't write much about them. I hope this blog gives you all some insight into your kids and life at COTP. I've been amazed all over again at what a wonderful place it is and at the care that our kids get. I can't wait to bring Noah home, but I'm glad that he's here while he's waiting for me!

General Observations About Noah

2007-07-30T13:05:00.000-04:00

I just thought I'd write a few of my general observations about Noah. He is really a good-natured boy and he plays well with the other kids. Of course, he can throw a bit of a fit when someone's trying to take something from him, but nothing out of the realm of a normal 2-year-old. Today, he was actually being a bit of a stinkerpot - he kept trying to run away from me, wouldn't come or sit when I told him to. I would have let him stay out longer, but he was causing too much trouble!! I'm sure we're going to have a few struggles when he first comes home - a few time-outs will probably be in order! :-) But, in general, he's a sweetie - kind of shy - always excited when he sees me. I just can't wait until he is home with us and I can interact with him like Mommy instead of like a volunteer!

As far as I can tell, Noah hears just as much as any of the other kids. I really don't see any evidence that he's not hearing things. He doesn't always respond, but none of the kids respond ALL the time. Standard two-year-old selective hearing.

Noah is very playful and likes to be goofy. He had so much fun at school - just being silly with the teacher at song time. It was really cute. But, he also sat well and played with play doh quietly. Overall, he seems like a normal two-year-old boy.

One thing I forgot to say before (I'm adding this later) - Even though the nannies and kids call Noah "Louines", the volunteers call him Noah. He seems to answer to both most of the time. I suppose we might end up saying "Noah Louines" for a little while, which is fine, since that's going to be his name! (Noah Louines Pierre Hewitt)

Lazy Sunday - Day 6

2007-07-30T10:14:00.000-04:00

Yesterday was a lazy day around here (for me, at least). Maria said they try to keep activities down to a minimum on Sundays and they don't bring kids over to the guest house. That was fine because I felt like maybe I should spend a little less time with Noah yesterday anyway - he's definitely realizing that I pay special interest in him (even though I try not to too much - but he's always in the group I bring over :-) and I don't want him to suddenly miss me too much when I'm gone. So, I mostly spent the day in the guest house, taking care of Niki and hanging out with him and Daniella.

In the afternoon, the kids were out by the playset, so I brought Niki out with me and we sat and watched them play. All of the kids love to see a baby, so they all crowded around, checking him out. Unfortunately, Noah wasn't out with the other kids. The kids in the Elephant room don't seem to get out quite as much because the nannies need to be with the kids with CP. It's kind of a shame, but I know that Noah will be home soon and it won't matter anymore. Maria did say that sometimes one of the nannies will stay with the CP kids and the others will go out with the kids - just depends on which nannies are here. Later, Noah was outside and I took some video of him playing, but I think he must have escaped because a nanny came our and brought him back inside. The other day, he stood on the gate and played with the lock until he got it open - I see now how some of them escape so often!!

Here are some more observations about the kids:

Chrislande: She is such a sweet, angel-faced girl! She came over while I was holding baby Niki outside and she was so loving and gentle with him. She kept touching his little face. Of course, if one of the other kids tried to touch him, she would push their hand away and say, "No!" She wanted him all to herself!

Pierre: He is so cute and affectionate! He was giving Micah all these kisses and hugs. Of course, Micah was fussing about it, so he could have been doing it to make him mad, but I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt! :-) He actually did seem to be doing it nicely and not in a "pestering" way.

School Days - Day 5

2007-07-29T12:24:00.000-04:00

Yesterday. I got to watch Noah at "school." They have a teacher who comes in and teaches shapes, colors, numbers and basic concepts like big and small, over and under, etc. Of course, they learn all of this in Creole, but it's good that their getting a base in learning these things. I was actually impressed with how much they learn and with how long their school session lasts. They also sing songs and learn concepts like please and thank you. It was neat to see Noah in that environment. He's obviously hearing just about everything because he would repeat what the teacher said, even though the room was often noisy and she wasn't sitting right next to him. It's obvious that he understands a lot - I wish I knew more Creole!! I'm going to have to really start studying Amy's Creole book! Noah was so funny - when they were singing and doing a ring around the rosey type dance, he would often just break down in these huge giggles and fall to the ground. He was having so much fun!!

In the afternoon, I brought Noah over to the guest house and just sat with him on the patio for awhile. I had a book with us and tried to get him to repeat the names of the animals, but he wasn't interested (he repeated me when I said other things to him before, though, so I know he was hearing me). Elly took some pictures of us out on the porch and then I brought him back to the baby house because it was about time for dinner. It was nice to just sit and have a small amount of quiet time with him. When I brought him back to the baby house, though, he didn't want me to go he held onto my hand and cried when I put him down. It's so hard to see him sad!! Of course, there were three or four other kids crying because I wouldn't pick them up either, so I decided to make a quick escape!

The Hospital - More of Day 4

2007-07-29T12:15:00.001-04:00

I forgot to write about our trip to the hospital on Friday night. Yanise is already there with meningitis and it looked like Ruth was getting sick too. No one wanted to take any chances, so Blake and I brought her to the hospital in Milot that night. The pediatric ward of the hospital is basically a large room with cribs in it, plus a little neonatal room where the newborns are kept. It's not much to look at (someone has to stay with the child at all times and they just have a plastic lawn-type chair to sit in - the signs for the neonatal area and other signs are just written in marker on paper), but Blake says that the staff and the doctors there are very good. It's a private, Catholic hospital as opposed to the public hospitals. He said that at the public hospitals, there's garbage on the floors and people are basically left to die. Hopefully both Yanise and Ruth will be alright since they got to the hospital in time, but they could use prayers.

The drive home was interesting. I would have a very hard time driving in Haiti. The roads are filled with huge potholes that you have to navigate around and there are tons of pedestrians, even at night. And, of course, there are no street lamps, so driving at night can be a dangerous endeavor. It's amazing how many things we take for granted in the US!

Day 4 Cont. (and some of Day 5)

2007-07-28T19:28:00.000-04:00

Yesterday evening, I went over and spent time with Noah while they were eating dinner. It's amazing to me how much food these kids eat!! They each had a huge bowl of noodles with white sauce. The nannies feed the kids huge bites at a time and they are each done with their big bowl of food in a matter of minutes. There's no way Jadne and Danielle could eat so much food, especially in so little time! I was feeding Noah and I could not keep up with the nannies' pace. I was trying to feed him big bites, but all of the other kids were finished eating and went for their baths and I was still trying to get him to eat the rest. I don't know the nannies' secret! Eventually, I gave up and one of the nannies took his bowl away with some still in it (I think he's the only one who didn't finish his off). Of course, the older kids (in the Lion room) feed themselves at a little table, but I've been told they eat just as much and just as fast. I guess that's just what they get used to.

Okay, here are some more reports on the kids I played with individually or in a small group:

Evanson and Sammy: I played with these two together, so I thought I'd talk about them together. Evanson was great at blowing bubbles and a real sweetie. He mostly wanted to transfer bubbles back and forth from my bubble wand to his bubble wand and he had quite the technique. Both Sammy and Evanson were fascinated when I would blow giant bubbles. They kept saying, "Blow a big one! Blow a big one!" And then they'd ooh and aah in amazement at the size of the bubbles. They played so nicely together - nice and polite and great at taking turns!

Ti Kendy - Kendy is so funny! He talks so excitedly about everything! Almost everything he says, he yells. The whole time we played with bubbles, he shouted and pointed at this or that. It was as if he were talking about the most important things in the world!!

Woosben, Thania and Kassandra (Robert's sister): These three were so funny together. Kassandra was being a bit of a stinkerpot, putting bubbles on Thania instead of blowing them (Kassandra and Thania weren't great at blowing the bubbles, so they were finding other ways of entertaining themselves I guess). Thania would get upset and Woosben would go over and wipe the bubbles off of her and try to make her feel better. It was really sweet. Woosben was a master bubble blower - maybe the best out of all the kids. Thania and Kassandra would bring the bubbles over to Elly and I so that we could blow them for them.

Moise and Reubens: Moise and Reubens were only interested in bubbles for a short while. After that, they were too concerned about the fact that they could see Blake cutting branches from guava trees to care about the bubbles. They kept shouting, "NO Blake!! NO!!" at the top of their lungs. I wondered if they were concerned they wouldn't get any more guava. They also sat down together on a chair and shared a guava while they were with me - it was pretty sweet to see how nicely they shared it (Moise seemed rather possessive of it when he showed it to me, so I was surprised that he shared at all). You could tell that they were very good buddies. When it was time for them to be done, I told them who to send over and they said, "No" and started making their own suggestions (actually a few of the kids did this, but I specifically remember Moise and Reubens doing it). It's funny how they want to make sure the "right" kids get turns (I actually think that I got all of the Lion Room kids and a few from the Alligator Room between yesterday and today).

Totalte and Woosben: These two were being real clowns, running all around with their bubbles. Woosben was talking to Maria - a constant chatter that I couldn't understand, but it was making Maria laugh. I was surprised at how well Toto was doing with the bubbles - he really is an amazing boy and so very sweet!

Emmanuel: He had a fun time in the guest house with us reading some books. He was able to identify some of his animals and count to ten. When we were playing with bubbles, I was trying to get him to sing and dance for me again because he had made me laugh so much when he was doing that in the kiddie pools, but he was too busy bubble blowing and I could only get one quick song out of him. He is always full of energy and smiles and his little dimples are just about irresistible!!

Obenson: Obenson is eager to please and a real charmer! We sang some songs like "Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes" and he was always the first to do exactly as I did and repeat the words. You could tell he was just so proud when he got a "Bravo!" from me. It's obvious that he's very smart too - he caught onto things quickly!

Nadege, Jonas and Jacob: These three really like to get your attention! They immediately run to me every time I come to the baby house and try to climb on my lap or get me to pick them up! Nadege will immediately grab my hand. Jonas and Jacob will get these pitiful looks on their faces and just sob if you don't give in and pick them up. I think they know that when a strager comes, they'll most likely get the most attention that way. And it does work!!

Vanessa: Vanessa is such a sweetie! I'm amazed at the improvements she's made since I was here in 2005. She is able to get around now by pulling herself along the floor - it's really impressive how well she gets where she wants to go. She is always such a sweetie - always a smile on her face. She likes to carry this comb around with her and always offers it to me (or at least shows it to me) whenever I come by - I wonder if she's trying to get me to do her hair? She is very smart - she really did well in school today. I can't wait to see what life has in store for her when she's in her new home!!

Family Ties - Day 4

2007-07-28T08:38:00.001-04:00

Well, the highlight of yesterday was that I got to meet most of Noah's birth family. I won't go into details about it here (I figure it's Noah's history and, in the future, he might not be happy with the fact that I shared it with the world), but I will say that it was an amazing experience and that I'm so excited that I got to meet them.

Other than that, we played with a lot of bubbles yesterday. I brought Noah and three of the kids in his room overto play. It was fun, but the kids were too little to really blow bubbles and they mostly just ended up spilling them. We also had sidewalk chalk out and a couple of kids actually used it to color, but mostly they just transferred them back and forth into and out of the bin again and again. One would put them in another would dump them out, others would help the first put it bsck in again. They did this for probably an hour. I got some stories and read to them a bit, but somehow more and more kids kept making it out of the baby house and soon I had eight instead of four. I found once again that I am MUCH better at keeping control of them when there are only a few. I was really relieved when two of the nannies came over to help!

Later, I took some of the older kids over one on one and we read stories and then started bringing them two by two when they wanted to play bubbles (they had seen me with the younger kids earlier). Here are some observations of the kids (I know I always like to read about Noah on other people's blogs):

Peterly: He is such a sweetie. He knew quite a few animals and could count up to ten (although he sometimes skipped eight). Really smart! He didn't really want to sit and let me read full books (he preferred to point to the pages and name things). I doubt he understood them quite well enough. He was so cute - he lined up all of the books we had read in a straight line and counted them over and over. He also played really well by himself while I had to feed one of the babies. I remember Peterly being a real sweetheart two years ago when I visited - he hasn't changed!

Christola: She liked to let me read full books to her, even though she probably didn't understand all of them. What she really wanted to do was play with bubbles, though - she was so excited and did a really good job with them. She's really energetic and sweet.

Nelson: Nelson is the sneaky one. He somehow always manages to escape the baby house and once he's out, he's looking for some mischief to get into. His mama is going to have her hands full with him! But, man is he a cutie! He can melt you with those eyes and he knows it!

Well, I'll try to write more later, but I'm out of time for now. I'll try to write about as many of them kids as I can!

Summer Fun - Day 3

2007-07-27T09:44:00.001-04:00

Well, yesterday was another fun day here at COTP. I got to spend more time with Noah. I've discovered that it's much better to take a few kids over by the guest house patio than to try to see Noah over at the baby house. Every time I walk over to the baby house, I feel like I create complete chaos because so many of the kids just want to be held and want your attention. There is a group of probably seven or eight in each room that just mob me whenever I come by. They try to climb onto me, cling to my legs, knock each other over to get to me, and, if they don't get picked up, they cry - and when I say cry, I mean CRY! I end up causing four or five meltdowns whenever I go over there and it just makes me feel so bad. I'm always looking at the nannies thinking, "I'm so sorry - I know I'm just making life difficult for you." Noah is not one of the clingers. He sits off to the side and just watches me or plays quietly. When I go over to him, he looks up at me and gives me his little hand, ready to go where I want to go. I think he's figured out that when I come he gets to go over to the other building - he always seems happy to come with me. A couple of times, I've caught him looking at me and I think, "Does he know?" I doubt he really realizes who I am, but it's nice to feel that connection without having to worry about forming a bond that's going to get broken when I leave.

So, yesterday, I took several of the kids over to the guest house porch and we sang some little songs and I had them show me where their eyes are, where their ears are, etc. It's cute how eager they are to please. I had such a hard time coralling them, though. They wait to see how much they can get away with with the visitor! One of Noah's nannies came over to help out and they listened to her so well! I had been telling them (in Creole) to sit the whole time. She came over and told them once and they all sat right down. I was so impressed! After a little while, we decided to get the play dough out. It was really fun to watch Noah play and to see how he interacts with the other kids. He is a really low-key boy. He plays so nicely and is so focused on what he's doing. At one point, some of the kids had kind of lost interest in their play dough and he just started gathering it all for himself. He had a huge pile of play dough in front of him for awhile there.

Later, one of Noah's nannies, Rose Carmen, put my hair in braids. One of the older boys, Jesse (who speaks wonderful English) kept telling me, "Rose Carmen is going to do your hair later. She's going to do your hair later!" I couldn't tell if she was telling him that or if he was just saying it, but I guess it came from her. She was really sweet and my braids look great! I'll upload pictures when I get home.

While Rose Carmen was finishing my hair, Elly (one of the other volunteers) brought some of the kids to go in the kiddie pools. They love them! Noah kept jumping in the air and crashing down into the pool on his bottom. He definitely loves the water - I can't wait till he can go in our pool! These kids are not afraid to get water on their faces at all. They pour cups of waters over their heads and throw it at each other. So much fun! When the older kids came over, the boys were all singing and dancing in the pool - so cute!! Emmanuel especially was putting on a show for me - doing all these cute funny little dances. It's amazing how many of the kids I still recognize from when we were here two years ago. Some of them still look the same!

In the evening, I spent my time at the guest house. A few of the smaller babies stay at the guest house with the volunteers. I am incredibly in love with Daniella! She is five-and-a-half months old and only weighs 6 lbs 13 oz. She is just about the sweetest thing you've ever seen!! The volunteers keep teasing me that I'm going to have to adopt her. :-) I told them it would never work because I already have a Danielle, but they say I would just have to call her Ella.

I had one of the babies - Nikenson - sleep in my room last night, but I was pleasantly surprised that he didn't wake up until 3:30 AM. So, I actually got some decent sleep last night. And now I'm ready to go play today!!

Dreams IN Haiti - Day 2

2007-07-26T09:01:00.000-04:00

Well, yesterday I got to have dreams IN Haiti, instead of Dreams of Haiti. Pretty cool, huh?

Ruthlande and I got to the airport at 4:15 AM. Of course, we didn't really need to be there nearly that early, but that's when the airline said to come. The guy at the Lynx counter didn't even get there until about 5 AM. Oh well.

Ruthlande loved the flight! The plane is tiny - it only holds 19 people and you can't stand up in the plane. We were sitting in the front seat and you could see the propeller out the window. Ruthlande loved it! She was smiling and laughing and pointing out the window. Even when the plane took off - I was worried that she'd be scared because it was really noisy, but she was really excited and happy. It was very cute!! About a half an hour into the flight, she fell asleep (I was surprised she lasted that long - she had been up since 2:30 our time).

When we got to the airport, Sara and Daryl were there to meet us, which was really a relief to me because I was a bit unsure of the process once I got there. They were able to come right in and help with my bags and everything. On the way back to the orphanage we picked up Ruthlande's mama.

So, the reunion. It wasn't exactly what I had been picturing. I had imagined that Ruthlande would see her mama, light up with joy and reach for her (that's what she usually did when we would watch her video). But the whole thing was obviously very confusing for her. I handed her to Madame Mathieu and she just immediately started to cry and hold her arms out toward me. Her mama tried to comfort her, but she wasn't consolable at that point. It just about broke my heart - both because I felt horrible for Ruthlande and because I felt so sad for her mama, who just wanted to hold her little girl again when she'd been apart from her for so long. After awhile, she decided to give Ruthlande back to me so that I could hold her for most of the ride back to the orphanage. We were encouraged when her mama handed her her cell phone and Ruthlande played the "pass the object back and forth" game with her, but she still wouldn't go to her without crying. It was so strange and awkward because I wanted to comfort Ruthlande of course, but at the same time, I desperately wanted her mama to be able to comfort her instead.

When we got back to the orphanage, I caught a glimpse of Noah looking through the gate at the "visitors" (along with lots of other little ones). It was awesome to see him again in person. He looked like such a big boy! I then slipped away into my guest room so that Ruthlande could be with her mama without me there. With me out of the room, she eventually calmed down. I went over to the orphanage (from the guest house) and saw Noah. I'm supposed to keep a low profile while I'm here because they've had issues with kids feeling really abandoned when their adoptive parents came and left again. I don't refer to myself as Mommy and I only play with Noah in a group. It felt a bit strange, like I was stalking him, just watching and wanting so much to just swoop him up and say, "Hey, it's me!!" But it was still amazing to get to see him again. He was playing with a cup and some little toys and jumping around so playfully - I thought how perfectly he'll fit in with our kiddos at home. I did get to pick him up at one point and played with him by leaning over and letting him "fall" backward. He loved it and cried when I put him down, which broke my heart, of course.

We then went to Madame Mathieu's house, so I got to see where Ruthlande lives and meet her family. Her sister had been so excited to see Ruthlande again - Madame Mathieu said that she had woken up that morning very early and said, "Now, go get Ruthlande! Bring Ruthlande home!" The kids were a bit reserved when we got there - I'm sure it was all strange with me being a stranger and because Ruthlande was back to crying and reaching for me. I'm sure it's not what her brothers and sisters were expecting. Still, they were so gracious! They let me take some pictures so I can show Jaden and Danielle where Ruthlande is living now. The kids got all dressed up for the pictures - it was so very sweet! I said goodbye to Ruthlande, which was bittersweet, of course. I know that things will go back to normal for her quickly. This whole experience must have been so confusing for her. I'm still glad that I brought her back here myself. I think the entire trip would have been traumatic for her if she'd made it with someone else. And I'm so glad that I had the privelege to meet Madame Mathieu and to see for myself where Ruthlande lives.

Back at the orphanage, I was surprised to find that all of the older kids knew that I was Noah's mommy. I went out to them and they all swarmed me, sitting on my lap, pulling at my skirt, playing with my hair (not necessarily gently - but they weren't trying to be rough). All the while, they were all yelling "Mama Louines! Mama Louines!" (Apparently, he still mostly gets called Louines). I was so shocked and baffled, I really wasn't sure how to react. So much for keeping a low profile!! Noah wasn't there at the time, though, and I'm hoping that he's young enough that he doesn't really understand. The last thing I want is for him to feel abandoned by me! Later, I played with him and one other little boy and I got to see how he interacts. He plays really well and he was so cutely trying to keep everything cleaned up. Nelson would throw crayons on the ground and Noah would go and pick them up. I saw his naughty streak too - he saw Nelson run away with a piece of paper and throw it on the ground and saw that I told him "No." So, then he got this cute sneaky look on his face and picked up another piece of paper and ran with it, looking back at me smiling that cute "I'm getting away with something" smile. He then peeked around the tree at me, smiling still. I told him "No, Noah", but I couldn't help but smile myself a little. It's so nice to see his personality - all sides of it!!

I went to bed early last night, of course. Sweet dreams in Haiti. And today is another day.

Traveling - Day 1

2007-07-26T08:54:00.000-04:00

So, Day 1 of travel was a crazily busy day. In the morning, I did a Noah's Ark workshop at a local preschool. Came home and fed the kids and gave Ruthlande a bath. Then, a photographer from the Daily Herald came by to take pictures of Ruthlande for an article they're doing about her (there should also be one in the Mundelein paper today - Thursday). We left at about 3:30 for the airport.

The flight went really smoothly. Ruthlande fussed a bit, but I gave her some snacks and a bottle and she fell right to sleep. She slept for the rest of the flight. :-)

We then went to the hotel - didn't get there until about 11:00 and then I didn't go to sleep until about 12:00. And the alarm rang at 3:00 AM. Time to get up already!! Needless to say, my brain really wouldn't let me sleep for that 3 hours, but at least I got a little rest.

More Fun Firsts

2007-07-18T22:59:00.000-04:00

Yesterday afternoon, Scott called from work and said, "Hey, you want to go see Ratatouille?" So, Ruthlande got to go to a movie at the theatre for the first time. She seemed to really like it, but we think it was a bit loud for her at first. Once she got used to that, though, she was reaching for the screen, trying to touch the picture in the sky! Her favorite thing about the movie was... the popcorn! Yep, just like my kids. Can't beat popcorn at the movie theatre!

Today, we had another fun first for Ruthlande - we went to our local spray park. She really seemed to like the water, but didn't love it in her face. Of course, my three-year-old would run and wipe her face with a towel every time the water got in her eyes, so I guess I can't blame a one-year-old for being antsy about being sprayed in the face with water. It was a fun way to spend the morning, though!

Not much else to report. The countdown is upon us - can't wait for the trip to Haiti!

Bo Bos

2007-07-16T22:08:00.000-04:00

Ruthlande's favorite "game" lately is to give me "bo bos" (kisses). It's really cute. Last week, I was kissing her little cheeks, saying "bo bos" and she starting reaching out to me with little fish lips. The same kind of kisses that my kids gave when they were babies. So, I kissed her and then laughed. She thought it was hilarious! So we did this over and over again. I'd say "bo bo?" She'd give me a kiss and we'd both laugh as I said "merci bo bo!" After a few times, she started saying "bo bo bo bo". So cute!! Now, she likes to do it all the time. If I play along, it's an easy way to get giggles!

She also seems to like peek-a-boo. My neice was playing with her yesterday and she actually started covering her own eyes too (the first time I've seen her do that). It's so fun to see her being playful!

I can't believe that our trip is coming up so quickly. I feel like there's so much still to do. I can't wait to see how happy Ruthlande will be when she sees her mama again. I know she's missing her so much. Today I was wearing a tank top and she starting pulling it down, trying to suck at my chest. I remembered that Sara told me that Ruthlande was breast fed until just this past April. Oops! Trust me, sweetie, there's nothing there for you! It just made me even more sure that it's time to get her back to her real mama before she gets even more attached to me. I feel 100% like that was the right decision. Can't say that about much in life, so I guess I should savor it, huh?

Countdown to Haiti

2007-07-15T10:18:00.000-04:00

Well, I'm trying to get ready for the trip - I had to make an appointment for Ruthlande with Dr. Ruge and I'm trying to get myself set up for travel immunizations. And, of course, I need to start thinking about what I need to pack. We fly out of O'Hare on the 24th (we'll be in Haiti on the 25th), so that's not much time to get everything arranged. Luckily, Scott and I are used to doing things last-minute, so it's nothing new for us.

Yesterday was a fun day. Jaden has been asking me to make him a "Mama Chante" video. "Mama Chante" is what we call Ruthlande's video of her mama ("chante" means sing in Creole - most of the video is Ruthlande's mama singing to her). So, he laid down on a pillow on the floor and we sang goofy songs that he made up and then we read a story while my mom recorded it all. Then, of course, we had to make Danielle a "Mama Chante" video too. They really loved it and it will be a fun thing for them to watch while I'm in Haiti. Jaden wants to make some more videos of Ruthlande too - he says he's going to miss her when she goes home. I'm sure it's going to be really strange around here once she's gone.

We took a trip to the park yesterday evening - the weather was absolutely perfect and the kids found some little friends to play with. I just wish that Ruthlande could walk so that she would enjoy it a little more too. She likes to be outside, but she can't really participate in much, of course. She's not too keen on sitting in the grass, so she usually just stays in the stroller. I did put her on my lap while I went on the swing the other day and she did enjoy that for a few minutes, but then started fussing. She doesn't like to feel off-balance - I think it's partly due to her issues with balancing herself while sitting up.

Anyway, yesterday was a good day. Today, we're going to my nephews birthday party, so we've got another full day!

We're Going to Haiti!

2007-07-12T23:19:00.000-04:00

Due to the amazing generosity of our friends and family, we have reached our goal. We have already been promised enough to cover Ruthlande’s travel expenses!! Honestly, we cannot thank you enough for the outpouring of support that we have been given. It amazes us!

If you were thinking of making a donation and hadn’t let us know about it yet, I encourage you to still donate to Childrens Medical Missions. If you go to their website, you will see that they have 11 children with donated medical care in place and they just need the money for flights for these children. They also have 4 children needing to go home in July. We can tell you from our experience in caring for Ruthlande that these children are a blessing and that the medical care that they receive here is life changing and often (as in Ruthlande’s case) life saving! These kids would not have a chance for help in their home countries, but here there is hope. So, further donations will be gratefully accepted!

Thank you again for all of the generous donations that have already been promised!!

The Hewitts (and Ruthlande too!)

Let's Get This Sweetie Home to Her Mama!

2007-07-12T00:51:00.000-04:00

Ruthlande is doing amazingly well and is ready to go home to her mama now, but we need to raise the funds to get her there! We could wait until the end of August and send her with someone, but we really feel like she needs to be home sooner than that – she is definitely attaching to me and I’m afraid that the longer she spends here, the harder the adjustment will be for her when she gets home. A month and a half is a long time in the life of a one-year old! This must all be so confusing for Ruthlande. It’s not as though we can just explain it to her. Sara at COTP has told me many times how much Ruthlande’s mama is missing her and can’t wait for her to be home.

So, I’m going to escort Ruthlande to Haiti myself. I’m sure this will make the trip much less scary for her. Plus, I’ll get the chance to meet her mother and, as a bonus, I’ll get to check in on Noah too. But, we don’t have the money to pay for the whole trip (and Childrens Medical Missions West doesn’t have the money either), so we're doing this on faith. We know God will work it all out!

For flights and hotel, (I’d have to stay in a hotel one night), everything will cost approximately $900. If you feel led to help out with the travel costs, please email me at nicolehewitt @ hotmail . com (leave out the spaces - I couldn't figure out how to use a hyperlink to do this!) Your donation would be made to Children’s Medical Missions and would be tax deductible (check out their site at http://www.cmmwest.com/

Thank you so much for reading this and for prayerfully considering helping Ruthlande go home!

Fun in the Pool

2007-07-08T22:41:00.000-04:00

Well, we've had a lot of fun this past week. We finally got some use out of our pool - we opened it a bit late this year because of everything going on. I was so excited to get Ruthlande into the pool. I was really hoping she would like it! Well, she wasn't so sure about it at first, but she warmed up to it pretty quickly. Now, she's a definite pool lover, just like the rest of us! It's been so much fun to see the kids being more and more daring when it comes to swimming in the pool. Danielle's willing to "swim" by herself (with water-wings, of course), Jaden's swimming with his face under water, eyes open (again, with water wings), and Ruthlande went from being scared to being excited about the water in a matter of minutes. I grew up with a pool in my backyard, so there's nothing better to me than family time in the pool!

Jaden's birthday party was yesterday and we all had a lot of fun. Hard to believe my little Buddy's five already! Even harder to believe that Noah is almost three - I'm beginning to doubt we'll have him home before his birthday, which is pretty depressing. I guess I should be used to the delays by now, but I just can't help but be frustrated. Now we might have a problem with getting our I-600 (which is part of the process that happens in the US) and it just feels like we might never bring him home. I just don't know how it got to this point and how new problems seem to crop up just as soon as an old one is solved (or sometimes even before the old problems are solved). I can't help but wonder when it will all end - when will we get our little boy home??

For now, we just wait. And wait. And pray...

Gimme those fireworks!

2007-07-04T23:49:00.000-04:00

Well, party #2 went really well - we had a lot of fun and Ruthlande seemed to do even better than at the last party. Of course, Scott had her in the front carrier for a long time, so she was snug as a bug in a rug in there.

On the way home from the party, we saw some nearby fireworks, so we pulled over into a parking lot to watch them. I was really glad we did because the kiddos really enjoyed them. Ruthlande especially loved them. She kept reaching her arms up toward the sky like she thought she could grab them. Every time a new one would go off she would smile and babble at it. It was so cute! I was afraid that the loud noises might scare her, but she had nothing but love for fireworks! I'm glad she got at least one opportunity to see them in her lifetime!

Party Time!

2007-07-02T23:06:00.000-04:00

The month of July is a big month for us. We have lots of family parties going on! We went to the first (a birthday party for our twin neices, who are 10 hours younger than Jaden) yesterday. I was actually very impressed with how well Ruthlande did. She's still a bit wary of strangers. I always remind people that her first two weeks in the US were spent in the hospital, where there were tons of new people coming in and out. Most of those people were there to poke or prod her. It's no wonder she gets nervous when she sees someone new now!

So, the first hour or two of the party, Ruthlande was quiet and a bit nervous. Someone at the party touched her hand and she broke out into instant tears! But, as the party went on, she must have figured out that no one there had any IV tubes or catheters up their sleeves - she relaxed and turned back into her normal, cute self, chattering and smiling away at people. She won their hearts in no time. I even got lots of cute pictures of her sitting in the grass, smiling. Up until yesterday, the words "sitting" and "smiling" did NOT go together - Ruthlande does not typically like it when we sit her up on her own and don't help to support her. So this was a great moment for me (and for her, of course!).

At any rate, I was very happy that she eventually warmed up to the party because we're going to another one on the 4th, we're having a party for Jaden at our house on the 7th and then we're going to a third party for our nephew on the 14th. Guess we'll have her turned into a party girl in no time!

Today was Jaden's actual birthday, so he got to open his presents from our family. Boy, was he excited!! I love this time - I know eventually he's not going to be impressed with anything we give him, but right now he ABSOLUTELY LOVES every gift!! Ah, I wish it could last!

Pictures of the Beauty Queen

2007-06-30T23:19:00.000-04:00

Ruthlande spent the day yesterday (and last night) with a friend named Ericka who we met through COTP. You can see some cute pictures of Ruthlande on her blog at http://2guineapiggies.blogspot.com/. Ruthlande had a great time and Ericka's son, Brendan, absolutely fell in love with her. Apparently, he doted on her completely. While Ruthlande was at Ericka's house, the rest of us went to Great America to celebrate Jaden's birthday (which is on Monday). We had so much fun! Jaden, Scott and I went on the Demon three times (the last time, we sat in the front - by Jaden's request). The last time, Jaden decided he'd had enough, though. He said, "I'm so happy when it slows down and stops because I hate being corkscrewed. It broke the bones in my back!" Of course, when we tried to say that maybe we shouldn't go on the Demon next time, he said, "No, but I love it!" Guess that's what roller coasters are all about!

So, today, we went to Flash Portrait Studio to get pictures taken of the kids. I really wanted to get a good picture of Ruthlande to send home with her - I'm sure her mom won't ever have a chance to get a professional portrait of her. Of course, once we got there, she absolutely refused to smile. She had been smiling and laughing ever since we picked her up from Ericka (and she was just as happy after the pictures) - she was in the best mood! Until the photography studio. She, of course, didn't want me to put her down. We tried everything we could possibly think of - everything that makes her laugh hysterically at home. Nothing. The photographer mentioned that some kids can be intimidated by the lights. When I looked at them, it occurred to me that they looked a lot like the type of circular lights they had in the hospital. No wonder she was scared! We finally had to give up on the idea of getting Ruthlande to smile and just be satisfied with the fact that she no longer looked sad or worried. The photographer was so nice, though. She spent a whole hour with us, trying to get a great shot. We did actually end up with the really sweet picture that you see above (obviously, this is not as high quality as the real picture). Even with only a hint of a smile, she's the prettiest baby girl around!

A Changed Girl

2007-06-25T22:17:00.001-04:00

It's been a few days since I've posted because I was attending a Noah's Ark Animal Workshop conference over the weekend! If you've never heard of Noah's Ark, we do workshops for birthday parties, day cares, etc. - the kids get to stuff the animals themselves - a lot like the places in the malls, but the parties are done on-site and the prices are more reasonable. :-) (If you want to learn more about it, go to http://www.noahsarkworkshop.com/nicolehewitt_s2018/ - hey, I've gotta put in a plug, right?)

Anyway, I had a great time at the conference and I'm proud of Scott for taking care of the kids all by himself for a day (he had my mom's help the second day). Thanks, Scott!

Ruthlande is doing really well - she is generally playful and happy, which is great. She really loves it when I hold her and play with her hands or touch her nose. It's really sweet to see her smiling so much!

She does have two teeth coming in, which has made her a bit fussier - she's been waking up at 2:30 or 3:00 AM and crying. One thing I've figured out though - she's a lot fussier for me than she is for anyone else. I've noticed that if my mom is here watching her while I'm getting some things done or if Scott is watching her, she's content to sit in her chair and observe the action going on around her (or watching some TV with the kids, or playing with some toys). But, if I'M here and I try to put her in the seat, she cries and cries. She is not happy unless I'm holding her. I've gotten her to sit on the couch and play with toys for a little while (if I'm sitting next to her), but it seems that lately she won't even stay there for long without wanting me to pick her up. It breaks my heart because she holds her little arms out toward me with this pitiful look on her face, fussing and crying. So, I unfortunately, don't get much done around here. :-) Of course, I put her down sometimes anyway, but I have to do whatever I need to get done while listening to her fuss, so I probably rush through as much as I can! Oh, yes, I remember those baby years! :-)

But, in general, we're doing great around here! Ruthlande is seeming so healthy now - it's really great to see. The wound on her back has pretty much completely healed and she seems like a different girl than the poor little sweetie who we first met. I've been watching the video of Ruthlande's mama singing over her - it amazes me to look back at what she was like then and then to look at her now. Such a change!! There's nothing better!

Hey, Toys ARE Fun!

2007-06-21T17:09:00.000-04:00

Ruthlande has just been figuring out (or perhaps rediscovering) that it's fun to play with toys. It's nice to see her playing and exploring things instead of just sitting in my lap all day. The big problem is that when she's in my lap, she doesn't really seem to want to do much but lay back and relax - she won't support herself (why do that when I'll do all the work for her?) and she doesn't seem interested in the toys that I try to dangle in front of her. Sitting on her own on the floor is hard for her and she pretty much just cries. I do sit her up that way at least once or twice a day because she needs to gain strength (as per doctor's orders), but it's not terribly conducive to playing. She also doesn't seem terribly interested in toys when she's laying down (she does play a little bit, but not for long) or when she's reclining in the bouncy seat - again, maybe she feels like when she's laying back she's supposed to be relaxing. Who knows?

But, I have now found a position that seems to work for playing! If I put her in the corner of the couch, she is supported enough that she can sit up without struggling to hold on, but she still has to do some of the work herself (she holds her head up well in this position). When sitting there, she seems content to play for at least a little while. Sure, she'd probably prefer to just have me hold her all day, but we're making progress. That's all we can ask for!

Some other things we've learned about Ruthlande:

She loves meat! She'd rather have a hamburger or hotdog than fruits or veggies. Of course, we have to cut them up small, but she eats a lot!

I can sneak veggies into her diet if I cut them up small and put them into her rice. Otherwise, she won't eat them at all!

It's better to let her "cry it out" at bedtimes than to stay with her. Okay, I know plenty of child-rearing experts would cry foul on this one and most adoption experts would say this is all wrong (not that we're adopting Ruthlande, but I figure the situation is similar). But, it turns out that when I stay with her and try to ease her into bedtime, she'll cry really hard for an hour or more. She thinks that if I'm in the room with her, there's no good reason that she shouldn't just be sleeping on me. But, if I leave the room, she cries weakly for a few minutes and then calms down. I figured this out when I had to leave the room to take care of Jaden and Danielle at one point. It made me feel guilty at first, but I've pretty much decided that the experts aren't living here, so I'm going to do what works for us. :-)

She'll only drink milk with a little bit of chocolate in it. Okay, before you all say, "But the experts...!" again - I first saw this in a parenting magazine and my pediatrician actually recommended it for Jaden (who also refused plain milk). It's amazing what just a little bit of chocolate will do! The doctors and nurses at the hospital all seemed really concerned that she wasn't drinking more and this seems to be the only way to get her to do it.

She loves kids and dogs! Both seem to make her smile more often than anything else!

So, that's it for today. I'm sure I'll be making more Ruthlande discoveries along the way!

Files Stuck in MOI - Part 1

2007-06-18T17:00:00.000-04:00

Lots of people ask what the status of Noah's adoption is and what the hold-up is about. This should give you an idea of why Noah is stuck in the Ministry of Interior (MOI) and why we desperately need your prayers on behalf of these children. This was written on June 3rd by an adoptive mom named Vera after her trip to the MOI last week. I've shortened it so that you can get the idea of the mess in Haiti.

Sunday, June 3, 2007

Haiti trip - Ministry of the Interior - May 2007

It has been a while since I updated my blog. I came back from Haiti last week from a 10-day trip. Tamarah's finished adoption file was stuck in the Ministry of Interior (MOI) for almost three months. I had called the Director of Political Affairs' (DOPA) office in mid-April to find out my daughter's file status and was told that my dossier was okay and if I came in person, it would be signed out to me.

When I got to Haiti, I went to the MOI to see about getting Tamarah's file signed out. It took two days just to locate her file. There are three offices in MOI that deal with the adoption files.

Office #1 is the Unit Juritique. This is the "original office" where all finished adoption files went through prior to the other offices being added in January 2007. In this office, there are one or two lawyers who review the files for accuracy. The lawyer makes sure that all Haitian documents, from birth certificate to adoption decree do not have any mistakes. Once that review is done, the file used to get signed out and was ready for passports. Now, once the lawyer has reviewed the file, a letter is typed by the secretary and the file plus unsigned letter goes to Office #2.

Office # 2 is the Director of Political Affairs (DOPA) Office. This is where the letter is signed by the DOPA. According to a conversation with him, the file goes to yet another office, but I only saw three offices involved as I followed the files. Once the DOPA has signed the letter, the dossier file and letter go to Office # 3.

Office # 3 is an upstairs office in MOI. I do not know the name of that office. The director of that office goes to the DOPA (office #2) and gets files that have the signed DOPA letter. He takes the files back upstairs and then interviews one of the orphanage representatives about the adoptive parents. The orphanage worker brings copies of dossier documents, passports, driver's license, employment verficiation, homestudy report, letter from pastor, etc. for this interview. The interview is guided by a form questionaire that has to be filled out. Instead of allowing orphanages to take a form with them to fill it out, it has to be done with that director. It takes about 60 minutes to fill out one form. Once the form is filled out, the file is signed out to the orphanage and is ready to go to passports.

From my personal experience, once the file comes out of MOI, all the original documents come back to the orphanage and the papers are taken to the Immigration Office where the passport is applied for. Once the papers are submitted, the child has to go to get fingerprinted at the Office of Immigration for his/her passport. Depending if an orphanage pays for an expedited passport or not, getting the passport takes between one to four weeks.

Once the child has the passport, for a U.S. adoption, she/he can get the visa physical and once the sealed envelope with the physical is received, the application for the visa is ready and can be submitted. A child can have his/her visa phsyical started prior to the passport being issued, but has to return a second time with the actual passport to verify the identity.

At the time that I got to MOI with Mirlande (adoption facilitator's Haitian assistant), approximately 200 finished adoption files were sitting in one of the first two offices in MOI. I had been told of a family that has been waiting for nine months for their file to be signed out of MOI. Keep in mind that this was a rumor, but I knew that my file had been in MOI for three months.

What is so frustrating is that once papers are submitted to MOI for signature, the child has already been legally adopted and carries the adoptive family's last name. The child is no longer an orphaned child and has a family. However, that child cannot join his/her family until MOI has signed out the file. It really felt like our children were held hostage. At least that is how it felt to me.

The first two days, we spent in Office # 3, sitting and waiting for adoption files to come upstairs for interviews. Most adoption workers sit in Office # 3 to wait and see if any of their files are ready for interviews. They come every day, sit in a hot office and wait.

The people who work in that office are nice. One clerk was especially polite.

When I asked the director, who was not working on any files for the first two days, about the adoption files, he told me that he only works on files when "they send them." I asked him who "they" were and he would not answer that. He was polite and would laugh at me and my frustration. I asked him to please consider my position... I had been told that my file was ready if I came in person, I could get it signed out. I had a sick baby. I had to take a week off from work, pay $1,000 for an airline ticket, just to sit in a hot office and be told that maybe "they" would bring my file. He would just laugh and tell me not to be upset.

At the end of day #1, after having waited in office #1 for most of the day without seeing any adoption files worked on, Mirlande and I went downstairs to the DOPA office. It was locked. We were told that somehow the door had been locked and nobody could get into that office, not even the Director of Political Affairs. (I do not know if that was the truth, but that is what we were told and the door was obviously locked.)

At that point, I called the Haitian Ambassador in Washington D.C. and asked for help. I had had some contact with his office prior to coming to Haiti. I explained the situation to the Ambassador's secretary and gave her the necessary phone numbers in MOI.

Mirlande and I went home...I had a sick baby to tend to. The Ambassador called me back and said that he had talked with the DOPA in person and that he was told my file was ready and to come back on Tuesday (day #2).

On day #2, we went back to the office #3. Again, we sat for a long time in that hot office. We asked about my daughter's file but got no answers. We went downstairs to office #2 of DOPA and again found that office locked. So, we went to office #1. We found that my file was still in office #1 after three months! The secretary in that office had a legal pad with a list of names and Tamarah's name was on one of the pages. She confirmed that her file was in their office.

I asked about having the file sent to office #2. She was not sure about that. In the meantime, we had contacted our friend Rodon who is a "depute de la circoncription" - member of Haiti's Congress/Senate. He came to office #2 and after an explanation of what had happened, he went to office #1 and spoke with that director. The director confirmed that my file was okay and said to come back on Wednesday (day #3) to get the letter issued so it could be taken to office #2 for the DOPA to sign it.

We came back on day #3. We went to Office #2 and sat and waited for several hours. Since we did not see any "movement" for several hours, we went to office #1. We asked the secretary about the letter. The director and lawyer in that office told the secretary to finish the letter so that my file could be sent to office #2 with the DOPA. She secretary refused to type the letter. She would not do it and there was an argument between the secretary and the lawyer and director because both were directing her to do the letter. She continued to refuse.

After a while, the Director of Political Affairs (DOPA) walked passed me as he was entering his office area. When he saw me, he said some derogatory comments about me in Kreyol. He must have thought that I did not understand.

About an hour later, Mirlande was called into his office. I followed her. As the DOPA saw me, he said that he did not want me "La Blanc" in his office. I stayed on the outside of the doorway. He proceeded to scold Mirlande. He told her that he had signed 2,000 files in the past month for adoption passports. He also told her that he was upset that the Ambassador had called him. He said that I could wait all that I wanted, he was not going to sign the letter for my daughter's file.

Okay, let's do the math. Approximately 300 children are adopted to U.S. families per calendar year. I am estimating that about 100 children are adopted to Canadian families per calendar year, another 300 children to French families and maybe 100 more children to families in other countries in Europe. That adds up to approx. 800 adopted children per calendar year. I asked if the DOPA has sign for other passport permissions as well but was told that he only signs the letters for adoption passports. Considering that 200 files were waiting and had entered from January 2007 through April 2007, the math was just not adding up!

Moving on... It really concerned me that the DOPA was so angry about the Ambassador calling him. After all it had been the DOPA's office that had confirmed with me three weeks pior to day #3 that my daughter's file was ready for the letter to be signed, just to find it still sitting in office #1 in a file cabinet...three months later!

So, back to the "drawing board" - It was obvious to me that the secretary would not just disobey her boss in her office and that she was following orders from "above"... the DOPA maybe?

I contacted the Haitian Ambassador's office again, spoke with the secretary and explained what happened. Also, three moms in the U.S. were contacting the Haitian Embassy as well regarding this issue. They were waiting for their files as well. I did not dare ask for their files while I was in MOI since I did not want them to be "black listed" like my file had been. Two of the moms were able to talk with the Haitian Ambassador and relayed messages to me. He was working on it and was upset at the treatment that I had received. It seemed that instead of it being "no problem" it now seemed that it was a problem.

The good news was that by day #3, I saw people walking around in MOI with adoption files in hand. The director from office #3 came out of office #2 with about 20 files! Those files were ready for interviews and were ready to be signed out. At least there had been some effect to my efforts.

On day #4 (Thursday), we came back to the MOI and were told that my file was not ready. We were given the run-around again. We were told by some of the clerks that the DOPA was very upset that the Ambassador had called him. Again, the Ambassador was called and this time, he decided to go higher up. He contacted me and I was told that he had spoken with the Chief Cabinet Stanley Joseph (CCSJ) who is the head of MOI. He told me to go and see the CCSJ on Friday.

On day #5 (Friday), Mirlande went to office #3 and office #2 and then to office #1, found that nothing had "changed" and then called Rodon to accompany us to see the CCSJ. One thing about Rodon, he can get you into literally any office. Sure enough, he was able to get us to see CCSJ, also, it seemed that he was expecting me since he had spoke with the Ambassador.

I did not know what to expect...would I be yelled at again? Would I be told that my file would not be signed out?

I was pleasantly surprised. The CCSJ was a kind, educated, sharp and compassionate man. We explained the situation to him and he (on the spot) got up and said that he would look for my file. This was the moment to tell him about my friends' files also. One girl needs spine surgery and one boy has terrible Asthma....I was able to give him a total of seven names and file numbers.

He came back and said that it would be done. He also told me to ask all the parents to please be patient because he had just been appointed to the position and had not officially started yet. I was beginning to have hope again. He seemed very concerned for the sick children and promised that the files would be signed out as soon as possible. He told Mirlande to come back the following Tuesday for the files. I was leaving on Monday.

We left his office with a lot of cautious hope in our hearts!

However, when Mirlande went to MOI on Tuesday, nothing had been done. As a matter of fact, the DOPA waved my file in front of Mirlande and told he that it along with the other 7 would never be signed.

Mirlande called me in tears! ---- Back to the "battle stations"! ---- We called the Ambassador again. He made his calls and reported that our files would be signed and ready by the end of the week.

Finally Progress! - On Friday afternoon, two of the six files were signed out following the form interview. One of the files was mine. (PRAISE GOD!) The other four files did not get signed out because there wasn't enough time to do the form interview, but they are ready!

Mirlande is taking a few days off and will be back at MOI on Thursday for the other files. I really don't know how she does this, day after day. It is exhausting. I was exhausted! I was sad to have to leave Haiti without Tamarah, again. But now I know that it won't be long for her to get her passport and visa.

This should tell you what we're up against. I'm just praying that Noah comes home soon!

Nicole.

Files Stuck in MOI - Part 2

2007-06-18T16:45:00.000-04:00

Below is a note from the main Haitian adoption Yahoo group on June 14th. A second woman is now working with officials in Haiti to try encourage the Ministry of Interior to release files. The US Embassy has also stepped in, ordering all files that DO get released to be gone through by them before the children leave the country. They are wanting to record timelines to follow this mess. I'm not sure there is much else they can do. Here is the note for the petition we have signed...

"Several families have been working behind the scences trying to get the impasse with passports and the Office of Political Affairs cleared up.

I have spoken with the Haitian Ambassador to the US, Mr. Ray Joseph many timesover the last several weeks about the problem with passports. He is not happy about the situation and has made many calls without success. Mr. Joseph has also enlisted the Chief Cabinet Minister Mr. Stanley Joseph. All efforts have not worked and it has been decided that parents need to go to the Minister of MOI for help. I have written a letter on the behalf of parents (parents who sign the letter) to the Minister of MOI pleading for help.

I will FedEx the letter on Tuesday the 19th a noon. I will also cc Ambassador Joseph and he will also send the letter to the Minister of MOI (Mr. Paul Bien-Aime) via hisown channels".In reality, only a couple of files have been released since I last posted. It seems that there is no-one who can stop this man from holding our children. "

Please pray urgently for this situation as it seems there is no end in sight for the over 200 families caught in this mess. God is bigger than this. I know that without a doubt.

Files Stuck in MOI - Part 3

2007-06-18T16:08:00.000-04:00

Below is a quote from Vera's blog tonight. Vera is the woman who went in person three weeks ago to Haiti to plead with the MOI to let our children come home. She gives a great explanation of what is happening today with the cases in the MOI....

"Haiti Update - June 16, 2007

I am on my way to Haiti again, this time only for a few days. Both babies have been really sick. It is so difficult to be thousands of miles away from your children under normal circumstances, but it is especially difficult when they are sick. I was especially worried about Tamarah because she has sickel cell. Well, how can I say that - because Erna is only four months old. I was just as worried about her.

About three weeks ago, I had been told that my file was signed out of the Ministry of Interior, just to learn that this was not true. This short trip was planned in response to these news because I was going to get Tamarah's visa next week and bring her home with me. I was so sad to learn that her file had not been signed out of MOI, in fact, it is still in the Director of Political Affair's office.

A letter was written last week, currently on line at http://ibesr-updates.blogspot.com/ to petition the Minister of Interior, Mr. Bien-Aime, pleading him with him to put a stop to the Ministry of Interior's holding up of the children's passports. So far, over 200 parents have signed the letter. This is the second petition, the first was sent to the President of Haiti in May.

President Preval will be in Washington next week, asking for funding for Haiti. He wants to eradicate corruption and give Haiti a "jump start". We should definately pray for his plan to eradicate corruption, it will take God's intervention, I am certain.

When I was in Haiti, I met with the Chief Cabinet Stanley Joseph, a really nice man, however his promises did not come through for a variety of reasons. He has been told that all passport files were signed out of MOI. Well, the adoptive parents waiting for their children's passports would know about that, don't you think?

The Ambassador of Haiti to the United States, in Washington D.C., Mr. Raymond A. Joseph has tried his best to help the adoptive children passport hold up to no avail. When he meets with President Preval next week, he will give a copy of the petition letter to him as well.

I find it absolutely amazing that one person can hold up all these passports. I find it amazing that this person does not get checked on. He has made claims, including to a Haitian newspaper that published the claims, that he signed out 2,000 adoptive passport files. He has made claims that there is no waiting passport file in MOI because he is signing 100 files per day. If somebody would take the time to check on his claims...

I find it amazing that adoptive parents from all over the world have gotten together to put together this letter and to petition the different Haitian government officials. The internet is amazing. By the way....that is how we know that no 100 files per day are being signed. There were about 200 files for passports waiting inside of MOI in May, now that number is closer to 300 as adoptions have been finished and children are ready to join their families.

I hope and pray this problem will be resolved soon.

Orphanages are filled to their capacity because the children waiting for passports, children who are legally adopted, children who have parents cannot leave. As a result, children who need to be in the orphanages are sent away. What happens to those children?

Prospective adoptive parents are turning away from Haiti. They no longer want to adopt from Haiti because there seems to be so many delays and issues. Those parents could have become parents of the children that the orphanages had to turn away. It breaks my heart.

I have some photos of a morgue in Port au Prince, Haiti that has dead babies stacked like dolls on bookshelves that reach from the floor to the ceiling. Dead babies! The photos are surreal. I had contemplated posting those pictures, but I think that it would be too shocking for anybody..."

It is really so frustrating that this is happening - that Noah is legally ours, but he still can't come home to us and we have no idea when he'll be able to come home. It's hard to imagine that one person (or at least one office) could do all of this harm and it's even harder to imagine why he would want to. Please be praying that this situation is resolved soon!

Nicole.

Happy Father's Day!

2007-06-17T22:00:00.000-04:00

We had a really wonderful Father's Day! First of all, we went to Willow for the first time since we've had Ruthlande with us - it was nice to be back! After the service, they had what they called "Dad's Fest" - the Willow parking lot was filled with classic cars, racecars, show cars, construction equipment, fancy motorcycles, big rigs, boats... you name the vehicle and it was there. They even had a real helicopter and a monster truck! The kids (and Daddy too) had a blast checking out all of the cool rides. I really wish we would have brought the camera! Scott put Ruthlande in a front carrier and she seemed really content to be carried around that way the whole time. It worked out perfectly!

In the evening, we made homemade strawberry banana ice cream (yum!) and then we went out in the back yard and played Scott's Father's Day present - a game of lawn darts. We all had lots of fun - even Ruthlande who was just watching from her seat. Whenever someone got a point, we would all cheer and Ruthlande would laugh and clap! It was really cute - it made us cheer louder just to see her reaction!

Hope all of you had a great Father's Day too!

Doctor's Appointments

2007-06-15T23:04:00.000-04:00

Ruthlande had two doctor's appointments this week. On Tuesday, we went to see the infectious disease doctor, who mostly just asked me questions on how Ruthlande is doing (has she had any more fevers, etc). She gave us the green-light to take Ruthlande off of the IV medication and to start giving her oral medication (we only have to give her diflucan for one more week to make sure her yeast infection is truly gone). So, the home health care nurse came by for the last time on Wednesday and removed her picc line - yay!!

Then, on Thursday, Ruthlande had an appointment with Dr. Ruge - the neurosurgeon who performed her surgery. He also gave her an all-clear as far as her health is concerned and said that she no longer has any restrictions (such as not being able to be immersed in water for a bath). The stitches are really looking great - she'll have a scar, of course, but it already looks so much better than I imagined it. She's also doing much better at holding her head up - Dr. Ruge said we just need to keep sitting her up on her own (even if she fusses about it) so that she'll continue to get stronger.

So, Ruthlande is doing well! We had a lazy day around the house today, so there's not much else to say, but I thought I would update everyone on the doctor's appointments anyway.

Who Needs Sleep?

2007-06-13T23:09:00.000-04:00

Unfortunately, I'm one of those people who needs at least 8 hours of sleep per night and could really use a lot more. If I could sleep in until 9 or 10 every morning, I think I probably would - Now that I have children, I'll never be able to test that hypothesis, but I'm fairly certain I could win some sort of medal in a sleep marathon.

Last night, I got about 3 decent hours of sleep with a few dozings spattered in between. So, as you can imagine, it was not a good night for me! For some reason, Ruthlande woke up a lot last night and cried every time she woke up. I thought it might be her hair clips (the hairstylist had said that she would most likely be able to sleep with them in, but that they might bother her), so I took them out on one side of her head, but that didn't seem to help. At 2:30 AM, I was able to soothe her back to sleep by holding her hand, but then I couldn't get back to sleep myself - I ended up tossing and turning until 3:00 and then deciding to head downstairs to watch the TV for a bit. At 4:00, I decided to turn the TV off and try again to fall asleep, but within minutes Ruthlande was once again crying. I went back upstairs. She was calm while I took more barrettes out of her hair, but as soon as she realized that I was planning on going back to bed, she started wailing. Nothing Scott or I did made her happy. We tried giving her a bottle, we tried stroking her hair, we even tried putting on the video of her momma - all to no avail. Finally, at 4:45, Scott gave up - he picked her up and laid her on his chest. Still, she cried, "Mama! Mama!" The poor little thing. So, I said, "I know I'm not Mama, Sweetheart, but I hope I'll do for now." I laid her down on my chest and she immediately stopped crying. She was asleep within minutes. It was pretty sweet and it made me happy to know that I made her feel secure enough to sleep. I'm guessing she probably didn't sleep in a bed alone in Haiti.

One thing, though. Remember how I said I'm one of those people who needs a lot of sleep? It also just so happens that I'm one of those people who really can't sleep with another human being laying on me (or while I'm laying on someone else, for that matter - as much as I love him, I can't fall asleep while snuggling with Scott). So, Ruthlande slept soundly for the next 3 hours and I kind of dozed on and off, trying desperately not to feel uncomfortable and not to move very much. Obviously, this can't be our permanent sleeping arrangements - not if I want to be able to function for the next month and a half. I'm hoping last night's events will be an anomaly - a one-time occurrence - I guess we'll just have to wait and see! Tonight, Ruthlande went to bed with very little fussing, so I'm hopeful.

The rest of the day today was good - Ruthlande was smiley and cheerful, so apparently the lack of sleep hadn't bothered her too much. And even I was feeling relatively energized during the day. I did take a catnap during the kids' naptime, but that was apparently all I needed. Thank you God! Oh, and Scott and I got to go on a little excursion this evening - my mom took care of the kids while we took advantage of our Great America seasons passes (which we got before we knew anything about Ruthlande coming). I got to go on roller coasters - so all is right with the world, as they say. :-)

Well, I'm ready to crash now. Wish me luck!

It's All About the Hair

2007-06-12T22:01:00.000-04:00

We had another good day today. It seems that Ruthlande has found her smile and is much more willing to use it! She was laughing and smiling at Jaden and Danielle again today and was REALLY having fun with Scott and I this evening when we were playing with her (while the video of her momma was playing in the background).

I'll get back to that, but first I'll cover the other exciting topic of the day - Ruthlande's hair! I found a place nearby that specializes in styling black hair and made an appointment for this evening. My attempt at braiding Ruthlande's hair had led to less than spectacular results. I just didn't know how to part it right and I didn't have the right products to make it lay down smoothly. At any rate, check out the cute pictures to see the results of Ruthlande's first trip to the hairdresser! Suzanne, who did her hair was so incredibly nice. She ended up not only doing Ruthlande's hair for free (I had been expecting to pay $35), but she also gave us some free products and the name of a book that will help me learn to style Ruthlande's hair myself. We'll just have to wait and see how successful I am. :-) Suzanne also told me to bring Ruthlande back to her right before she goes back to Haiti and she'll give her a nice style to send her home with. Isn't that awesome!? I just know her momma will love it!

So, when I got Ruthlande home, I put in the DVD of her momma singing to her, so I could get some nice smiley pictures with her new hair-do. In one of the songs, her momma, her four-year-old sister and her aunt are singing something along the lines of "Je je la la!" It sounded very fun and seemed to make Ruthlande happy, so I started kissing her little feet and saying "Je je la la!" She thought it was hysterical!! Now, mind you, I had no idea what I was saying, but she seemed to really love it, so I decided it must have been something really funny (if anyone reading this has any idea what "Je je la la" might mean in Creole, let me know in the comments). Then we moved on to something even funnier! I pretended to eat her hand and made little gobbling noises (followed by our new magic words, of course) - apparently, having your hand eaten is really just the funniest thing imaginable. Scott got in on the fun too and Ruthlande kept holding her hand up for him to gobble her some more - we managed to get it on video and it's just so cute! It made us incredibly happy to see her having so much fun. This is the Ruthlande we've been waiting to meet!

Our smiling girl!

2007-06-11T14:31:00.000-04:00

So, yesterday was a bit of a strange day for Ruthlande. She was less fussy than usual - she was sitting in her seat without crying - usually she just wants me to hold her and isn't happy with anything else. And, I heard her laugh for the first time yesterday! Danielle was playing with her - showing her toys and laughing - and I heard Ruthlande laugh back! I was so excited. Of course, as soon as I came over to see, she looked up at me expectantly and stopped laughing, but I was just happy to have heard it!

So the laughter was exciting, but the rest of the day didn't go as well. She wouldn't really eat or drink much and she threw up a little bit at lunch. We're worried because this can be a sign that she's not tolerating her hydrocephalus. She did eat a bit better at dinner and hasn't thrown up since, though, so for now we're just watching her carefully. I know from my kids that throwing up once could mean just about anything (including that her food just didn't go down quite right). Still, it's hard not to worry!

Today, Ruthlande has seemed much better - no more throwing up and she's eating decently (still wish I could get her to drink more). But, the best news of today is that Ruthlande was laughing and smiling again! First, she smiled again at Danielle (she likes Danielle!). But, she was smiling and laughing like crazy when I put on the video of her momma and brother and sisters singing to her! I so wish that I had played it for her earlier! Just to preface this, I had shown her the picture of her momma a few times before and she started crying, so I was a bit leery of showing her the video. It felt like I was being a little cruel, showing her a picture when what she really wanted was her momma here with her. But, I decided to try again and show her the video today. I'm so glad I did! She almost immediately started to laugh and reach her arms up toward the TV. At first, I wasn't sure if she was laughing or crying, but it became apparent after a few minutes that she was definitely laughing and smiling! Just take a look at that picture! She actually tried to sit up in the seat to reach the TV! We'll definitely be playing this video every day now.

Denny's

2007-06-08T21:37:00.000-04:00

Yep, the whole family ventured out to Denny's for dinner tonight. It actually went very well. Ruthlande was a bit fussy at first, but I asked the waiter to bring us a piece of wheat bread while we waited for the food and that worked like magic! She actually finished the last bite of bread just as the food came. Of course, then she wasn't at all interested in the grilled cheese or applesauce that we got for her (both of which she ate great at the hospital). Funny thing, though - on a whim I gave her a little piece of my hamburger and she loved it! She ate a lot of that!

The rest of the day was somewhat stressful, but we hung in there. For some reason, Ruthlande seemed fussier than usual - she REALLY didn't want me to put her down. And, of course, Jaden and Danielle took full advantage of the fact that I was busy with Ruthlande - they were quite the handful today. Ruthlande took about an hour to go down for her nap. She was SO tired, but just didn't want to give in. Typical one-year-old I guess!

At any rate, when Scott got home, I was ready for a little stress-relieving dinner out with the family, so I was really glad that that's actually what it turned out to be! Plus, Ruthlande went down like an angel at bedtime - didn't make a peep! So, we ended the day on a good note! And tomorrow is another day... :-)

A Trip to the Park

2007-06-07T21:58:00.000-04:00

Today was another good day (what a difference a nap can make!). I decided it was time to venture out of the house and take a trip out to the park. I tried to put Ruthlande in the umbrella stroller at first, but it was too upright and the poor sweetie couldn't hold herself up well enough in it. So, we switched to the double stroller, which was good since Danielle wanted to ride at that point anyway. Ruthlande was not too happy to be in the stroller. She cried for about half the trip to the park, but then eventually calmed down. She was happy to sit in the stroller at the park and eat her applesauce. I tried putting her in the swing, but, as you can see from the picture, she was not thrilled with that either. She didn't warm up to the swing at all, so we gave up. When it was time to leave, she only fussed a bit when I put her back into the stroller - progress!

Bedtime is the most difficult point of the day at this point. Ruthlande doesn't like me to leave her and that seems to really intensify at bedtime. She just cries and cries. I have to sit and stroke her hair for awhile and then I can gradually move away from her crib. I have to sit on the bed until she goes to sleep or she'll cry again. I'm hoping that we'll eventually get past this, but for now I don't want to leave her - she's got to have abandonment issues! It just breaks my heart!

No Nap for Ruthlande

2007-06-07T01:00:00.000-04:00

Ruthlande was a bit fussy today because she didn't get a nap. Poor sweetie - twice, she had just gotten to sleep when someone showed up at the door and woke her up. The second person was the home health care nurse who was here to draw some blood and change her IV dressing. Well, she did NOT like her IV dressing being changed and she cried and cried. After that, she was just not going back to sleep.

So, she was really clingy and fussy in the afternoon. She would cry any time I would put her down. I'm still happier with that than with the disinterest she seemed to have in the hospital, though. I'd rather see her upset than just not seeming to care one way or the other about what was happening around her.

2nd Day Home

2007-06-05T19:34:00.000-04:00

Well, my first full day with all of the kids on my own went really well. Ruthlande seemed to be feeling well and she napped during Jaden and Danielle’s “resting time,” so that worked out great. In fact, this first day went so well that I have to keep reminding myself that it won’t always be this easy. We’re off to a great start!

Look at the picture of Ruthlande laying on her back - that's a big deal for her!

Day 14 – 1st Day Home

2007-06-04T19:33:00.000-04:00

Well, it took us a bit longer than we expected (we were told Ruthlande would be discharged at 8 AM, which turned into 1 PM), but Ruthlande was released from the hospital today! We’ve already had our first visit from the home health care nurse – It seems like the IV antibiotics are going to be really easy to give her – not a problem at all. I uploaded some more pictures to Snapfish (Sara – I’ll try sending more to you too), so feel free to check them out. Tonight will be Ruthlande’s first in-home bath and I’m going to try to wash and comb out that hair of hers – wish me luck – after two weeks in the hospital with nothing done to her hair, I’m going to need it! :-) I honestly think I’m more nervous about her hair care than her medical care!

Ruthlande is able to sit up with some help – she’s still having a bit of trouble holding her head up, but the doctors say her neck will get stronger. Nothing’s changed as far as the hydrocephalus is concerned – I’m just watching for any signs that she’s not tolerating it. If she doesn’t end up getting a shunt, it might be good if she could still visit those specialists that come to PaP once a year so that they can evaluate her to see if it’s getting any worse.

Ruthlande isn’t yet smiling, but she is definitely responding. Dr. Ruge says it is possible that she may have partial paralysis in the face, causing her to actually not be able to smile. This condition can sometimes be associated with spina bifida. I think this might be the case because she will sometimes do something that looks like she might be trying to smile, but it doesn’t quite come through. She is definitely playing with toys more and “talking” to them a lot – it’s really cute. I got a little bit of it on video, but not much because she clams up if she sees the camera! And she now cries when I leave the room or if I put her down after I’ve been holding her. I see this as a good sign because it shows that she cares enough to want people around her. She was SO quiet before that it was really strange. The only time she made any sort of noise at all was when she cried when we would move her or change her diaper or something. Otherwise, she would just lay in the crib, completely silent. So, I was very excited when she starting making noises when playing and was even happy when she started crying when I left her. She’s showing lots of improvement. I think she just needed to get rid of those fevers to start feeling well enough to show some personality!

So, all is well in the Hewitt household! We’re looking forward to figuring out our new daily routine and taking care of the sweet little girl who we already love!

Day 11

2007-06-02T01:32:00.000-04:00

It looks like we have something worked out with home health care. As of right now, they can’t get anyone out to us until Monday, but we’re waiting to see if they might be able to move that up. Ruthlande is going to get a pick line today and she will be ready to come home tomorrow (if they were able to get home health care tomorrow). She hasn’t had a fever since midnight Wednesday.

They gave Ruthlande the picc line today at 2 and all went well. She still hasn’t had a fever since 12 AM Wednesday, so I think we’re probably out of the woods as far as that is concerned.
She has definitely seemed more active. She’s been playing with toys more – she really loves the mobile that they put on her crib – I’m going to have to see if I can get my hands on one like it. She still doesn’t really move her legs (I have seen some very small movement, but in general she keeps them still), but she’s been more active with her hands and arms. Scott even got her to hold her own bottle yesterday.
Anyway, all is well. It’s looking like she’s going to be coming home to us soon, so we are very happy!

Day 9

2007-05-30T16:46:00.000-04:00

Well, unfortunately Ruthlande spiked a fever again last night. They gave her Tylenol and it hasn't come back again, but we're still waiting to see what happens. They did still find yeast in her urine, so it may simply be that. They took the catheter out today because apparently the tubing is a good breeding ground for the yeast. Now, we just have to watch to make sure she's emptying her bladder properly on her own - otherwise we may need to cath her every 4-6 hours or so. They have sent a sample of her urine to the lab so that they can find out exactly what type of yeast it is and determine if they need to change the anti-fungal that she's on. They also did a CAT scan yesterday to see if she had any abscesses in her brain (which sometimes happens with yeast infections I guess), but the CAT scan was clear.

I did get some bad news about her possible release from the hospital. At this point, they're not sure if they'll be able to release her because they don't know if home health care will come to us (since Ruthlande's care is being donated). If home health care won't come, she'll have to be in the hospital for at least two more weeks while she's on the IV antibiotics. This is pretty disappointing - I was hoping she might thrive more in our home. Plus, of course, it will be difficult for us to be here with her 24/7 if she's in the hospital that long. I think I would have to go home sometimes and just be with her as much as I can - definitely not optimum. So, please be praying that something can be worked out with home health care.

Day 8

2007-05-29T16:43:00.000-04:00

Well, Ruthlande has not had a fever since yesterday! The doctors have said she can come home with us once she has been fever-free for 48 hours, so I’m really hoping that her fever does not come back. Apparently, once she comes to our house, they will send a home health care nurse to help us administer the antibiotics – I haven’t found out the details about that, though.

I ran across this awesome verse on the Adoption Yahoo Group I belong to today. It really inspired me and reminded me that it's all in God's hands...

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us... Ephesians 3:20

Day 7

2007-05-28T16:39:00.000-04:00

Well, Dr. Ruge came in this morning and told me that they absolutely cannot take spinal fluid from Ruthlande's neck. He said that the risks are just far too great. In his words, "We don't want to send her back to Haiti a quadriplegic." I hadn't realized just how dangerous this type of tap could be, especially for a child with spina bifida.

So, Dr. Ruge said that he wants the doctors to make their best guess at what type of infection they're dealing with and create a treatment from their. They did find some yeast in her last urine culture, so who knows? Perhaps her fever could just be from that. They put her on an anti-fungal in addition to her broad spectrum antibiotics. If the fevers don't go away in the next day or two they'll look at her cultures again and try and figure out what other medicines to add.

Day 6

2007-05-27T16:34:00.000-04:00

As of this morning, it didn’t look like they were going to be able to test Ruthlande’s spinal fluid. They’re planning on keeping her on the broad spectrum antibiotics. I’m not too happy about this, since she’s been on the broad spectrum antibiotics since Haiti and her fevers haven’t gone away yet. The first doctor who I talked to had said that these antibiotics aren’t strong enough to treat meningitis. But, I guess there’s not much else they can do at this point if they can’t test her spinal fluid. When Ruthlande’s fever is down, she is awake and even playing with toys, but when it goes back up, you can definitely tell in the way she acts. Please keep praying that they can find a way to identify what type of infection she has so that they can properly treat it.

We spoke to the doctors again, though, and it turns out there is still a chance that they might be able to do the spinal tap at Ruthlande's neck. Apparently, in cases of spina bifida, the brain can sometimes move to a lower than normal position, which is what makes doing this type of tap dangerous. However, this afternoon, they gave Ruthlande an MRI to find out if it is safe or not to do it. Please be praying that they can do the tap and find out what the infection is!

Day 5

2007-05-26T16:33:00.000-04:00

Unfortunately, we got some very bad news today. The infectious disease doctor came by again this morning and said that Ruthlande’s culture grew more bacteria – so many types of bacteria that they don’t know what to treat at this point. They can’t possibly treat them all because some of the medicines would have serious side-effects. They need to find out which of these infections is actually in her spinal fluid in order to properly treat her and they can’t do a spinal tap because of her surgery. The doctor said that she spoke to someone who said that sometimes in adults they can take spinal fluid from the neck with the help of a radiologist. She is supposed to talk to a radiologist to find out if they can do this for Ruthlande. Please be praying that they are able to do the test this way and they will find out exactly what type of infection Ruthlande has so they can treat her. Ruthlande is still doing about the same right now, but if they don’t get the meningitis treated, she will definitely get worse.

Day 4 in the Hospital

2007-05-25T16:29:00.000-04:00

It's been a busyday here today because they moved Ruhlande to the main pediatrics floor (so, I did a lot of talking to the nurse in PICU about her care before she left). Then, shortly after we got to the new room, I had to go home for a bit to pick up my kiddos and bring them back to the hospital (luckily, I had a friend who was able to stay with Ruthlande while I left). At any rate, Ruthlande was awake pretty much all day, but she was acting like she was in a bit more pain and she was a bit shaky, I think from the fever, which has not gone away. They've been giving her Tylenol every four hours for the fever, and they gave her some morphine this evening for the pain. I was getting concerned about her today and then talked to the doctor and found out why she isn't looking as good as I would hope.

Unfortunately, it looks like Ruthlande does have meningitis. The infectious diseases doctor came to talk to me just before Ruthlande changed rooms. She said that the culture from the swab they did of Ruthlande's leaking fluid showed Acinetobacter bacteria. Because these results were received from the swab and not from a normal spinal fluid test, they cannot be 100% positive that it is meningitis, but the doctor said that they are presuming it is. There are two reasons for this - First, if there was bacteria on the fluid that was leaking from her sac, it only makes sense that that bacteria would have gotten into the fluid that went back up into her spine. Second, she has had a fever for several days and has no other known infections.

So, they are putting Ruthlande on a new, stronger antibiotic. She will need to be on the antibiotic for 3 weeks. If she is able tocome home with us before that three weeks are up, then they will put in a picc line.

The good news is that Ruthlande is eating and drinking a bit more today. We're still working on getting her to eat and drink even more, but I'm happy to see progress there.

As far as the hydrocephalus goes, there's nothing new to report. Dr. Ruge came by this morning and pretty much echoed the same things he'd been saying all along. He said we'll have to watch for vomiting in the coming weeks.

Day 3 at the Hospital

2007-05-25T01:10:00.000-04:00

Overnight, Ruthlande's blood pressure rose steadily and her heartbeat went down somewhat. She also became more unresponsive (she hasn't had pain medication since 8 PM last night, so it's not due to that). The nurse was concerned because these things could be signs that she's not tolerating the pressure in her head, so she called Dr. Ruge (the neurosurgeon). Of course, as soon as Dr. Ruge came in, Ruthlande was suddenly wide awake and much more responsive than she had been all night and morning. So, he would like to just keep watching her at this point. He says it's certainly not an emergency and she may just be re-adjusting to the increased pressure. As of right now, they're just continuing to monitor her.

She did do a bit better as the day went on. She was awake off and on and was much more alert when she was awake. The nurse said that they are thinking her elevated blood pressure might be normal for her (that might have been her blood pressure when she was in Haiti, before her sac started leaking). By evening, She was really awake and responsive. And she drank a bit more milk as well. She also responded to me for the first time - I gave her some milk and she wouldn't drink anymore, so I said "Fini?" and she gave me a little grunt. I asked her again, just to be sure and again with the grunt. You'd never think a little sound would make me so happy, but I was thrilled!!

Her skin is also looking MUCH better, which is a wonderful thing. They've got her covered in Aquaphor, so she's this little greasy girl, but it's really helping. I still haven't seen her move her legs - just her feet and toes - but she's still not moving around that much in general, so we'll have to wait and see.

Ruthlande

2007-05-23T15:40:00.000-04:00

Well, we got a call a couple of weeks ago from Robin, saying that they needed to find a host family for a one-year-old girl named Ruthlande who needed to come here for emergency surgery. Ruthlande has spina bifida and her sac was punctured, so she is leaking spinal fluid. They needed to arrange her surgery as quickly as possible - they had a doctor and hospital in the Chicago area that were willing to donate care, but they needed a host family.

Well, Scott and I talked it over - at first, Scott said, "I don't think I want to do that - if we're going to host her, it will only be because God tells us that's what he wants." That night, as I went to tuck Danielle in, a song was playing on her CD player - "Jesus loves the little children. All the children of the world. Red & yellow, black and white, all are precious in his sight. Jesus loves the children of the world." Hmmm... thanks, God, I got it.

By the time I got to bed, Scott had also felt God talking to him and he was thinking about the "what if's" (instead of ignoring the subject completely). We talked about it and came up with a lot of questions for Robin.

The next day, Robin was getting us answers to our questions when it looked like the doctor in Chicago fell through. Apparently, once he found out that Ruthlande had a tear in her sac, he didn't want to go through with the surgery. He thought the risks were too high and that she probably wouldn't even make it to the States. We were so upset to hear that Ruthlande might not even get a chance at living.

Well, about a week later, we got another call from Robin. There was still a chance that Ruthlande might come to Chicago. Would we be interested in hosting her? I called Scott and he said "Definitely." At this point, we wanted to do anything we could for her. They still weren't sure if she would be coming here, though. There was another hospital in Virginia that was a possibility.

We found out Monday night at 9 PM that Ruthlande would be coming to Chicago yesterday (Tuesday) evening. What a whirlwind!

We picked Sara and Ruthlande up at the airport and drove them straight to the hospital. The picture is of Sara and Ruthlande. Ruthlande was such a sweetie. She still had her fever, of course, and a horrible rash, but she was here, safe and sound. The night was a hard one because they couldn't get an IV into her - they literally tried all night but couldn't find a vein (and when they did find one, it would burst). But, this morning they finally put a main line in.

Ruthlande had her surgery this afternoon. The doctor who helped with the surgery said that things went well overall. He said he's never seen the spina bifida in such a progressive stage since it would usually be taken care of shortly after birth. Ruthlande is awake and in recovery now. They didn't put in a shunt for her hydrocephalus at this point. Apparently they believe that she is probably out of danger with the pressure in her head now. Since she has been living with the pressure for so long and she hasn't shown signs of developmental delays, they believe that her brain has found a way to drain on its own. There is the possibility that since they closed off the hole in her back that she could potentially have more pressure build-up since there is no release for it now. We will have to watch her for vomiting or other signs that the hydrocephalus has advanced (we'll find out more about those signs later). He said we may not see those signs for weeks or months, though.

Finally, I'm back!

2007-04-12T15:33:00.000-04:00

So, it's been a VERY long time since I've posted. I guess posting every day was a little bit too hard to keep up with so I just ended up stopping entirely. I really need to find a happy medium! :-)

So, what can I say about the last YEAR? We're still waiting to bring Noah home, which is very frustrating. I have not been doing great with the wait lately. It seems that every time we get one step closer, a few months are added to the next step. We were sure that we would have had Noah home for his second birthday, which was in October. Obviously that didn't happen. Then, we thought maybe by Christmas. Now Easter has come and gone and I'm beginning to wonder if we'll have him home by his third birthday. A week or two ago, I read a post on the Haitian Angels board from someone who had been out of IBESR for 8 months and was still waiting. I broke down in tears. We've been out of IBESR since December 6th. 8 months would mean that Noah would be home in August. I just couldn't handle it anymore. I was sobbing. Jaden and Danielle looked over at me and said, "Mommy, what's the matter?" I told them that I had just read something that made me think Noah is not going to be home for a long time. They were so cute - Jaden said "I'll just change it, Mommy," and he started typing on my keyboard. He figured he would just change what it said on my screen and everything would be okay. Then, Danielle said, "Don't worry, Mommy, I'll save you. Noah will be home soon and Danielle will save you." It was so sweet! Who could ask for better kiddos?

Since that day, I've had my ups and downs. We found out that we are finally past the next stage of the process (Parquet), but it's still unclear where exactly our file is at or how long we may have to wait. I read a few things about MOI (the stage where they approve your child for passports) and why it is taking so long. At one point someone said that things were worked out, but now today I read something about the head of MOI being afraid that people are using children for body parts! How do people get these crazy ideas?!? So, now he's apparently going over parts of the dossier again. I was hoping it would only be a couple more months, but now I'm not sure again. It's been very draining! Noah WILL come home, but it's hard to imagine when at this point.Well, I'll try and post more often again now - when there are actually things to say. That's all I can think for now. I'm posting Noah's latest picture - he's gotten so big!!

Dossier sent out

2006-01-06T16:29:00.000-04:00

Today was a very good day. We got our dossier sent out! Scott made the copies this morning, and I went and picked them up. Then, we met at a mail place at lunchtime and got our passport size pictures taken.